“Sorry. I was busy. You came all the way over here because I didn’t respond right away? You know that sounds crazy, right?”
“I was just worried.”That you ran again.
“I’m alive and well, as you can see.”
“I wasn’t sure for a minute there. When did you start doing this?”
Morgan rolls her eyes “It’s called aerial silks.”
“Okay, when did you startaerial silks?”
“Beginning of the summer. Now that you can see I’m fine, you want to leave?”
“Nope. What did she mean by soak?”
Morgan chews her lip as she contemplates how much to tell me.
“Come on, Morgan. You can trust me. We’re friends.”
Sighing, she takes a seat next to me against the wall. “I have to soak my ankle every day to help keep the swelling down. It’s much better now, but in the beginning, the daily therapy caused me a lot of pain. Yes, it’s therapy.”
“What happened?”
“It’s a long story.” Her voice is shaky.
I reach out and grab her hand, squeezing gently. “Message received. I’m here if you want to talk about it.”
For several moments, we sit in silence while holding hands.
“I injured myself while dancing. It was stupid, really. I went to make a sissonne, and when I landed, my ankle twisted and broke. Normally, it would have been fine after a couple weeks, but after going to the hospital, the doctors found that my bones had deteriorated. Because of that, I had to have physical therapy. After the initial exercises, my mom found this program that uses alternative methods to help heal after injuries.”
“How long do you have to do it?”
“Until the doctor clears me. Honestly, I love it though. I’m not sure I’m ready for it to end.”
“You looked happy up there. Scared the fuck out of me, but you looked like it’s where you belonged.”
She shrugs. “Ballet was always my thing. It brought me so much joy when I danced. I should have left it at that instead of yearning for more. You know they say only three out of ten students at HDA make it into professional companies when they graduate. Three out of ten. There were thirty-five students in my graduating class. That means out of them, a little over nine of them would see their dreams come true.”
“You could have done it. You’re the best dancer I have ever seen. You always looked so natural up there.”
“That’s because you’ve only really seen me dance. You should have seen the others. I was far from the best dancer in my school. It wasn’t just the dancing, though. The stress. The pressure. It got to me. It was too much. Have you ever loved something so much just to wake up one day and find that you don’t feel the same way anymore? It doesn’t bring you the same joy as it once did. You dread doing it?”
I think about her words before shaking my head.
“It’s a terrible feeling. That school, those teachers? They took the passion out of dance for me. I was miserable. I was missing meals because I wasn’t hungry. I wasn’t hungry because I was too stressed or practicing. You learn to work through the hunger and push on because mediocre is not acceptable.” She lets out a heavy sigh.
“Why didn’t you come back then? Why did you stay?”
She cuts her eyes at me before settling them across the room once more. “I considered it more times than once. I didn’t want to be a quitter though. Plus, my parents were so proud. Add on the fact that it was something I used to want as badly as breathing, and I felt like I couldn’t. I also felt like maybe I might not be welcome back here. Or maybe I was just scared to be back here.”
“Then I made your life difficult when you came back.” Rubbing my hand along my face, I turn to face her. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. I reacted without thinking first.”
She shrugs. “I didn’t expect a parade when I came back. Actually, you were much nicer than I expected. I remember how Reed used to rule this school with an iron fist. I figured you would too. Besides, if it weren’t for my injury, I probably would have never come back.”
“I hate to say this because it sounds selfish as fuck, but I’m glad you got injured—not that you were hurt, but that it gave you the excuse you needed to get out of that school. It broke your spirit, but I can see it coming back.”
She gives me a slight smile. “I get what you’re saying. At first, I was so depressed about my injury and having to come back here. I don’t think I truly realized how miserable I was until I came back. Now? I’m actually happy. I’m finding my love for ballet again in teaching Mrs. Caron’s younger class. I’ve learned aerial silks. Not to mention, I have a friend in Tinsley. That’s something I didn’t have at HDA.”