Page 66 of Fox of Fox Hall

Fox jumped, his tail flailing as he turned togape at Domvoda.

Domvoda stared at Conall for another strained,horribly quiet moment, then slowly turned to look at Fox. Fox hadalmost forgotten what fire looked like in Domvoda’s eyes. Domvodainhaled and spoke as though that fire wasn’t there, with most ofthe feeling smoothed from his voice. “A byr may have a mating withsomeone who is not byr, even if they are not passion-struck. Ifthey desire it. Others may judge but they can’t forbid it. Andexcept for the matter of heirs, even a king might embrace such amating if he dares to.” His hands were clenched at his sides buthis tail was still.

Fox didn’t know if he blinked, if he frowned, ifhis tail was arranged properly behind him. He stared at Domvoda inbewilderment.

“It was possible?” he asked at last, andoh, he was young and so, so foolish. “You looked at me likethis, like you want to keep me, and you could have, but youdidn’t?” He’d pushed Fox away and let the rest of the byr scornhim.

“I had nowhere to go.” Fox’s famed voicecracked. “And you left me that way. Because you didn’t dare admitto anyone else that you wanted me?”Darehad been Domvoda’sword. He hadn’tdared. Fox tossed his head to be rid of thatand all the feelings that went with it. “I know nothing of thisoutside of songs and evenIknow that is not what you dowhen you… when you….” He couldn’t say that any more than Domvodacould. The realization made his chest tight. “I’ve never had aplace, except for when I was very small,” he told Domvoda instead.“I still have no place because you won’t even make this onepermanent. This one where I play music for you and make you laugh.Even that you wouldn’t allow?” It hurt more than Fox wanted toaccept, so he focused on what didn’t make him feel so foolish. “Butnow a place has been offered to me out of kindness.”

“Kindness,” Domvoda scoffed.

Fox stared into his eyes without lookingaway.

“My king, I don’t feel your court is the placefor me any longer,” he announced carefully, shaking inside andperhaps outside, because Conall put a hand on his side to steadyhim. Fox threw Conall’s hand off, distantly noticing how Conallstraightened but keeping his attention on the king. “I am not yourFox.” Each word was sharp, then suddenly less so. “I… could havebeen. I don’t know if I would have been happy, but I would havetried if you’d told me.”

Or Fox might’ve been as afraid as he had beenwhen Conall had said it.

Fox’s anger slipped away with that thought.

“We’re alike in many ways, aren’t we?” he saidon a sigh. “Exactly as I told you. So I am not your Fox, but… but Iam available as your friend if you wish it. Or I could be, someday.And as your friend, I will advise you before I….” Fox wasdefinitely visibly shaking, his tail curled around his leg. “BeforeI leave to find where I am supposed to be.” He wondered if anyonein the whole of the receiving rooms was drawing breath. “You shouldlook for a consort,” he told Domvoda. “A true consort, not merely afertile who will do for an heir. You should speak with them, andask them questions, and learn to trust them. And once you do… ifyou love them, tell them. And even if you do not… beg for aknotting from them.”

Conall coughed, sudden and noticeable in thequiet.

Domvoda stiffened, his tail going still, whichwas when Fox belatedly noticed it had been flipping wildly.

Fox gestured with both hands, exasperateddespite his nerves. “There is another kind of freedom that can befound in being vulnerable and begging for something you know youwill get. If you trust them, if you believe they wish to protectyou even though you think you shouldn’t need that, beg. Or justask. That is my advice. Although,” Fox briefly closed his eyes,“legends aren’t real and I didn’t understand any of this onlymoments ago. So I don’t know that anyone should listen to me, theSilly Fox.”

“The Sweet Fox,” Conall corrected. “Soft Fox,gentle where others wouldn’t be.”

Fox turned to him, mesmerized to find the lighthadn’t disappeared from Conall’s eyes.

“You’re the bravest person I have ever met,” heinformed Conall with false calm. “That’s probably why you make mequake inside. Even when I met you—saw you—it was…. I don’t know thewords.”

“I think you do.” Conall’s mouth curved up. “ButI can wait until you find them.”

“Ruthless.” Fox should not be warmed by that.“But kind.” He dragged his gaze back to Domvoda and the whip of histail. “A kindness that others could know. Your court would be ahappier place ifyouwere happier. Do you believe suchthings are out of your reach? That you must be alone? That you mustbe distant and cold? Yet now I claw and scratch you and you allowit?Oh.”

Conall had said Fox didn’t know what he did toDomvoda. Fox still didn’t. But Domvoda wouldn’t have allowed anyoneelse, not even Conall, to speak to him like this in front ofothers.

Fox shook his head again, more confused thanupset. He would probably stay confused. Domvoda stared at him, headup despite the hurt evident in the movements of his tail.

“I think I’ll go now,” Fox said as gently as hecould, and then not at all gently. “Mychoice thistime.”

Then he drew in a long breath and looked atConall.

Conall angled his head toward Domvoda. His tonewas quietly respectful but he kept his eyes on Fox. “Thank you forthe prize and the honors, my king.”

“The purse!” someone called helpfully. “Don’tforget Byr Conall’s favor!”

Fox startled at the reminder, then bent down topick up the purse before turning to identify the speaker.

Byr Din smiled serenely, oblivious to the glaresof the byr around him… or pretending to be. A short distance behindhim, by the doors to the gardens, was Byr Falnya, Byr Shine next tohim. Byr Shine was beaming. Byr Falnya met Fox’s stare and archedan eyebrow, possibly amused.

Fox looked away before his attention would drawDomvoda’s wrath to anyone else, then moved on unsteady legs, theheavy purse clutched to his chest. Byr stepped to the side as ifwary to be near him now, although this time Fox didn’t blamethem.

He was beneath the arch of the doorway at theend of the rooms when he stopped.

Conall probably did not want to come with him.He had duties to attend to, and, after all, Fox had just groped histail in front of others. Maybe the nice words had been to shameDomvoda and Conall had given Fox the money to tell him politely tobe on his way.

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