Page 66 of Loathing My Boss
My attention lowers to my sunscreen bottle. My breath catches. I look between my greased hands and Viktor’s back. He wants me to… No. No, no, no. That’s a health and safety violation. Meaning that: I will combust.
Nothing makes sense. Nothing at all. This sculpted, beautiful man is attracted tome?Frumpy, pear-shaped,baggy-t-shirtedme?
Can’t be possible. This is the cruelest prank I’ve ever been subjected to, which is indeed saying something. I cannot believe he found it in himself to overcome the sheer disgust of touching his mouth to mine. I cannot believe how much energy he’s put into the aftermath…into making it seem like he’s thought of little else since.
When I’ve not moved for several hours—or several years—Viktor glances over his broad, broad shoulder at me. “If you aren’t comfortable with helping, I can ask Odessa.”
Squirt.
Slap.
My hand rests, printed against his body, leeching his warmth into my fingers, and I…I do not know why I did that.
Not at all.
What triggering magic witchcraft words did he just say that compelled my limbs to action?
His lips curl; my pounding heart stops.
“You have to spread it, sweet pea,” he murmurs, sultry, voice rough. “Over every centimeter.”
My lashes flutter as I take in the many, manycentimeters. There sure are a lot of them. Voice breaking, I say, “I’m not strong enough.”
“Of course you are. Think of the alternatives. Do you want me to burn?”
I meet his eyes. “Yes. In the fiery blaze of—”
He tuts, silencing me. Then the monster says, “Be good,” like he genuinely believesbeing goodis something I’m capable of.
It isn’t, but I manage one whole centimeter of sunscreen coverage. All by myself. Someone get me an award.
“That’s it,” he murmurs, and boy am I glad thateveryone else is happy to burn as they plunge themselves deeper into the lake, splashing, laughing, probably chattering about how they havegotto add something like this to their books. “Good girl.”
I shudder. “Quit that.”
“Quit what? Words of affirmation is another way to prove I love you.”
Words of affirmation is my top love language, for sure. But I don’t appreciate him scrolling through the five—outdated—love languages. This is what happens when you’re wooed by a relic. He uses disproven science. Like a moron.
Sucking in a breath, I state, “You knock it off, or I’ll shut down yourphysical touch.”
Blessedly, that makes the man face forward, so I can finish dousing his back in sunscreen. Once I’m done, he rolls his shoulders back. “Thank you, sweet pea. Ready to stretch your fins?”
For the record, once I do enter the water I will be doing exactly what Potato does—bobbing aimlessly, with very little fin stretching. “No, I’m not. We have to wait fifteen minutes before going into the water.” Skeptical, I narrow my eyes. “You’d know that,ifyou normally used sunscreen and weren’t just using it to bully me. Well-played. Revenge isn’t a bad color on you, sir.”
“Trust me, Crisis…this scheme had nothing to do with revenge.” He scans the scene before us, then starts walking. “Let’s sit on the dock while we wait.”
Used and abused, I don’t know why I gather up our stuff and follow him.
A breeze teases our hair as I plop my bum down, dangling my legs off the edge and just above the water. Setting my bag safely behind us, I check that the quiet water cannot possibly develop into a tsunami. Then, Isquint up at the sky, scanning for birds. Even with my sun hat, I know that, generally speaking, the outdoors are not safe for me, for the wildlife itself conspires to my doom.
Mindlessly, I scoot closer to Viktor, as though he’s likely to protect me. At least while he’s trying toprovehe loves me, he should, right? That would be common sense.
“Have you had the crisis thing happen your whole life?” he asks, voice soothingly low.
I tense. “Yeah. I guess. Bad stuff just likes me. It’s probably karma.”
“Whenever I can, I’ll protect you. And if I can’t stop whatever happens, I’ll take care of you in the aftermath. I promise.”
