Page 82 of Their Little Helper

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The milk.

Hmm.

Santos was clearly thinking something, so I took a chance and whispered softly. “Harley said you’d never tasted it and I guess I can understand that.”

No. I could not, but that wasn’t the response he needed to hear at the moment.

“But I think it’s time that I ask a few questions.” Maybe? It had to be better than when Harley was awake just in case it was more traumatic than I was assuming.

I could handle trauma Papa…he might not be able to without worrying forever.

“I…” Santos’s gaze bounced between us for a few seconds before he let out a breath and rested his head in his hands. “Yes. You have the right to ask questions.”

I was his partner and coparenting our boy.

“You also have the right not to be ready for my questions, though.” He seemed to need that reminder, so I didn’t mind when he chuckled.

“I know.” Closing his eyes, he seemed to force himself to relax as he wrapped his free arm around me to rest his hand on Harley’s chest. “But there’s no reason to put this off.”

I wasn’t so sure about that but he needed to be in charge of the discussion for the time being.

“I lactate, yes.” That wasn’t a surprise but I nodded and waited for him to take the next step. “It started when I was a teenager, but unlike most of the men in the Lactin Brotherhood, I don’t struggle with having too much. Quickly pumping every couple of days is enough for me to be comfortable.”

Oh.

When he opened his eyes, it seemed to be him trying to decide if I understood the situation. I thought I did, but I crossed my toes that I wasn’t going to fuck up the situation. “So it’s enough to make dating narrow-minded people difficult, but not enough to make the guys who are into it happy.”

Barely nodding, Santos’s next words came easier. “It hasn’t made dating easy and it’s put me in a difficult position.”

Most men would probably think he was lucky as far as the lactating thing went, but I could see how it would be frustrating.

It still didn’t explain why he’d never tried it but that seemed to be a me thing.

“Well, it’s not an issue with us.” Harley didn’t seem to have a problem one way or the other, and I was happy to have Harley for milk cuddles. “So you just need to make what you need a little clearer. I don’t always understand why it makes some people…why it makes people react unexpectedly.”

Bodies were just bodies and did fascinating things.

Santos chuckled, leaning in to give me an almost innocent kiss that time. “Thank you for being careful with me, but I’m going to do my best not to react as strongly.”

Hmm.

“I’m not sure if that’s a healthy promise or not.” I was going to need a degree in some kind of therapy to deal with them both in healthy ways. “I think I’m supposed to let you react any way you need to.”

Although that didn’t really sound any better.

Santos shrugged, clearly not worried about what we should be doing for his mental state. “I need to think before I react or at least think as soon as I react and I haven’t been doing a good enough job at that. I’m worrying about issues that you don’t have.”

Because I was perfect and he just kept forgetting that fact.

“I’m sure you’ll find new ones.” People always did even if they had to make up ridiculous shit. “So let’s focus on those and not the ones we don’t have.”

Santos chuckled but nodded. “Deal.”

I was waiting for the other shoe to drop but he snuggled closer and kissed my head that time. Wondering if maybe there wouldn’t be footwear in my future, I raised one eyebrow and gave him a clear heads-up I was going to be a pain in the ass again. “So…can I kiss you?”

It was a make-out kind of night but I wasn’t ready to get up and brush my teeth yet.

“I deserve that question even if it’s a legitimate one.” We both knew it was, so I just waited patiently for him to stop being dramatic. “I was just surprised at how clearly I could taste him on you. It wasn’t…I was just surprised.”