Page 5 of Lane

Lane watched me, waiting for me to answer.

“Because I can’t handle you dating other men,” I blurted.

His deep-brown eyes widened. Lane didn’t expect me to say that. Hell, I didn’t either. His eyes narrowed as he became so laser-focused that I could tell how he fit into the Everhart family. He wasn’t Edison’s son. That didn’t mean he hadn’t picked up knowledge along the way. Lane wasn’t to be underestimated. “Is that so?”

I nodded, unsure of what else to do.

“Why is my dating bothering you? As I see it, you haven’t said shit to me about my personal life. You guarded me when I was trapped in that room before my asshole pretend father was killed. You’ve seen me around the building more times than I can count. You’ve even left here with me because Jordan thought I needed a guard. Thank god he’s off that kick, by the way. There was only so much of having someone up my ass, who isn’t fucking me, that I can take. So, tell me why my personal life bothers you.” I didn’t expect him to say all of that. I should have. Lane was pissed, and rightfully so. I had no right to question him. I also couldn’t stop myself from asking more.

“Is it fun for you?”

“Okay, so we’re playing a question for a question. You answer mine, and I’ll answer yours. Let’s see how long you last.” He was challenging me. I didn’t stand a chance. I’d cave long before he would.

I wasn’t a weak man. I guarded Jordan Altair Sr., the mafia boss of East Dremest, for fuck’s sake. I didn’t get to where I was by letting people walk over me. Standing before Lane was like looking down the barrel of a gun with no chance of disarming him. I wanted to shake out my arms and get this feeling to go away, but I didn’t dare squirm under his watchful gaze.

“Why?” he repeated.

“Because I don’t like the idea of you fucking different men every night. I don’t want to think about you on dates with people you shouldn’t be.” Before he could reply, I asked again, “Is it fun for you?”

“Tonight? Absolutely. The others?” He lifted his hand and tilted it from side to side. He didn’t wait to lob another question my way. “What’s the deal with you and Alton?”

My mouth dropped open. I thought we were talking about him and my jealousy. Suddenly, Alton entered the equation. “Truth?”

“We’re not doing this any other way.”

“I was shot a while back. A bullet tore through my side. Alton patched me up and stayed with me overnight. He didn’t like the way it looked and gave me antibiotics. I developed a fever late in the evening that worried him. Reghan later told me Alton fussed over me, paced, and was tempted to haul me to the ER, but Reghan talked him down. My brother knows me well. Unless I’m near death, I don’t want to be in a hospital.” My mom was a nurse. I would have thought I’d handle medical shit better.

“Anyway,” I continued. “The fever finally broke and when I woke up, there was Alton with a tear running down his cheek.” The memory of it sent a chill through me. Alton was so worried; it shocked me to my core. It was only a fever, but Reghan said it had more to do with me being the one who had it.

“I tried to sit up when I saw Alton. Him being upset was a knife to my chest. We weren’t anything, but I still didn’t like seeing him cry. He wouldn’t let me sit and eased me onto the pillows, coming close. I took him gently by the back of the neck and tried to bring his lips to mine, but he hesitated and wouldn’t allow me to close the distance. I couldn’t handle the rejection and released him. He tried to play it off as me not being myself, not knowing what I was doing, but I was fully aware. Alton doesn’t see me like I do him. He’s a prestigious doctor, and I’m just a bodyguard.” Saying the words burned. I wasn’t of the same caliber as Alton, never would be.

“Don’t do that to yourself,” Lane said fiercely. “I’ve met him. He didn’t treat me any differently because of who I am. He was probably telling you the truth and didn’t want to take advantage when you weren’t feeling well.”

“It’s not taking advantage when it was something I’d wanted for a while. It doesn’t matter now. It was for the best. Alton doesn’t see me that way. He’s never made a move, instead choosing to do everything in his power to avoid me.”

“You’re about as open as a door with no handle.”

“What?”

“Never mind. My point is, there’s no reading you. I realize you feel something for me, yet you don’t act on it. You obviously want Alton, except you think he’s above you.”

“You’ve been through a lot.” I shouldn’t have thrown that out there. My filter was currently nonexistent.

His eyebrow lifted. “Oh, we’re going there now? So, tell me how I should act and feel.”

“I’m not doing that.”

“Really? By saying I’ve been through a lot implies I’m still upset over it. Am I still grieving the loss of my mom? Probably. Everything else? Not in the least. I have zero regrets about the deaths of my pretend father or my brother. A weight lifted off me when they were gone. I’m free of them and that shit life.”

“Exactly.”

“I’m going to need you to say more than that.”

“Why would you want to be with me back in the same life you’re finally out of?”

“Um, Ray… I hope you don’t mind I call you that. I hear others do it.”

“It’s fine.”