Page 36 of Katie 3

“That’s how it started last time. You were sure she wanted all of us, but she wouldn’t engage with us unless Brad was there, watching or participating. You and I didn’t matter nearly as much.”

My fingers clench the page tighter as I listen to Henry.

“Katie isn’t like that and she doesn’t need to—”

“They called her as a witness, Carter. We can either tell her now or she’ll find out in court and then what will happen?” Henry demands.

“It’s Brandy. We both know she’s a flake,” Carter dismisses.

“She was all about Brad and you know it. If she could help Brad, she’d be there. Which means that we need to tell her. Better now than right before she gets on the stand,” Henry sighs.

I crumple the paper in my hand and step into the kitchen. I can read between the lines. They were with someone else the way they’ve been with me. Before my mom probably, but they shared another woman—all three of them.

Carter sighs. “You just told her.”

Henry turns around. “Katie, just—”

“You shared someone else and didn’t tell me? You had another girl just like the three of you have me and you didn’t—”

“Not like how we have you,” Carter says. “Doll, we love you. She was fun, but she only wanted Brad. It was hard to ignore. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to commit to what we were doing because I was sure…”

“That it was going to be the same,” Henry finishes after an awkward pause.

“You never told me that. I thought… I thought I ruined all three of you, that I had made you settle for sharing me, but you like it? You’ve done it before! And you didn’t tell me!” My temper is flaring.

I don’t know if it’s fair to be angry at them for having a past. I don’t know if it’s fair to be angry they didn’t tell me, but I’ve been stewing in my own guilt for so long, sure that I ruined the three men I love the most, that I somehow tempted them into this messed-up situation when it’s not even new to them!

“Katie, it’s not the same and it’s not—”

“Tell me how it’s different other than that we’ve lasted! It was new to me! Do you have any idea how much I blamed myself?For everything with my mom, the divorce, messing up your lives! And I didn’t,” I insist.

“We never said you did,” Carter soothes.

I step back. “How could you not tell me? I thought we talked about everything.”

“Doll,” he whispers.

“Angel, when would it have come up? All it does is hurt you. We all have pasts from before we met and—”

“That works for friendships, not for relationships. There can’t be love without trust and clearly you don’t trust me! Neither of you trust me!” I yell.

“We didn’t willfully… we didn’t sit down and have a conversation and agree to keep it from you,” Carter defends while Henry slips back, looking uncomfortable and introspective.

“You know I blamed myself for the divorce, for the problems, for continuing on with all of you. I’ve called myself a slut and a whore for being so greedy, but I’m not because you all did this before!”

The phone rings and I don’t even look at it. I can’t. Hurt, anger, humiliation, it’s roaring through me and I can’t push it down. The phone keeps ringing and I turn around to head to my room.

Tears roll down my face, but I’m not in any shape to be around these men. I need to think. I need to process this. I need to figure out what it means for me and… and my baby.

Henry

“Answer the phone, Carter,” I finally say, uncomfortable with the constant ringing and lingering silence.

Carter answers with a sigh. “Yeah, I know I’m not who… she’s not going to. She found out about Brandy… no I didn’t tell her everything. She’s been called as a witness… what do you want me to do, Brad? Storm up there and force her to listen? She’s not in the mood to do that… yeah, he’s here.”

I take the phone and Brad’s voice is exhausted. “Fix things with her. She’s our girl and she deserves to know we’re here for her. That this isn’t a kink we wanted to repeat.”

“She can’t think that.”