Page 145 of The Alternate Captain
“Is it, Johnathan? Because she had her claws in deep—and now someone from... you’ll end up staying there for good at this rate.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
Mom scowls at me. Her eyes are hard with a range of emotions that I can’t pinpoint. “And you’re probably at different stages of your life. Is she still at school? What are her plans after she graduates?”
“What does it matter?” I ask, feeling the heat in my muscles rising.
But then a thought slips across my mind—what are Kelly’s plans once she graduates? Apart from her pursuit of joining a national orchestra, but I’m not sure how long she’d want to do that for. And how long am I planning on staying in the UK?
“Just think about how reckless you’re being,” she says, her attention drawn towards the pager vibrating across the counter. She picks it up and glances at the screen. “I have surgery in an hour, so I need to go, but I won’t be impressed to learn that things are serious with this girl. Just don’t get her pregnant.”
Mom gathers her things.
“Have you been speaking to Dad?”
She observes my face. “No. But is there something I should know?”
“No, but—”
Exhaling, she looks up at the ceiling, then back at me. “All I’m saying is you have a different level ofemotional maturity, and getting yourself involved with a teenager is not good for your career direction—for life after hockey.”
I roll my eyes, but she doesn’t see because she’s already en route to the front door. Typical Mom. Conversation over before it really began.
“Merry Christmas,” I call, and get nothing back in reply.
Kelly’s sitting on the sofa, scrolling through her phone when I get back to the sitting room and my heart is in my mouth since it’s likely she heard every single word.
“Is everything okay?” she says, looking up at me.
I try to read her face, trying to gauge how much of the conversation she heard, but she gives nothing away.
“Yeah, babe. Fine.” I sit back on the sofa and reach for the remote control. Turning the TV back on and beckoning Kelly over to me. “Do you want to pick up where we left off?”
“Johnny—”
“Come here,” I say, and she does.
I wrap my arms around her and take in her scent, because I want to make full use of the short spell of time we have away from the reality of our everyday lives.
“Can we just watch a film or something?” she says. “A normal film.”
And I figure that tells me all I need to know, so I find something on the TV and pull the blanket over us both.
As with last night, I can hear her thinking again.
“Does the age gap bother you, Johnny?” she says, after around twenty minutes of deep contemplation.
“So, you heard it all, huh?”
“Well, yeah. And I was trying to not think about it, but—it’s just another thing, isn’t it? Maybe we’re not going to work out.”
“Don’t say that,” I say, adjusting myself so I can look at her. She’s got her back against my chest, so I prop myself on my elbow. “Please don’t say that.”
“Well, regardless of what happens, Johnny, I want you to know... I belong to you. My heart belongs toyou, but we need to make this right. Family is important, and I don’t want anyone falling out because of us.”
I feel like the fucking Grinch at this point because my heart swells in size. It’s growing in my chest, ready to burst out.
Am I in love?
