Page 53 of Knot The Only Onee
Alena scoffed. “What he means to say is that he’s hoping you’ve bonded with our cowboys, and he didn’t want to disturb the process.”
Heat spread across my face despite the fact they couldn’t even see me. “Uh,” I hesitated. “The question I have is kind of related to that.”
Oh boy, I only hope I was speaking quietly enough that the guys wouldn’t hear me from wherever they were inside the house.
“Ask away,” Alena replied.
“Have you ever heard of an alpha becoming a beta?” I fought to control my breathing. I wanted to know this for James. It made no difference to me if he was an alpha or a beta.
I loved him either way.
Yes. I loved him.
Despite the fact that we hadn’t been intimate. Despite a lot of things, I couldn’t deny the feelings in my heart any longer.
Elias cleared his throat. “Are you asking this about someone in particular?” He was the most dominant of Alena’s mates. The silent leader. The one that carried the weight of the world on his shoulders.
Like Noah.
“You already know the answer to that question,” Simon chided as he scoffed.
“I know. I just wanted to confirm.” Elias sighed. “One of my uncles has a fellow alpha in his omega circle. He was abused as a child, and his alpha nature never emerged.”
“But you said he’s an alpha now?” I asked before I started nibbling on my bottom lip.
“Yes,” Elias confirmed. “After he bonded with their omega. Actually, the first time they mated, his scent became more powerful, and his knot appeared.”
I could read between the lines and figure that he knotted while they mated for the first time.
“James has a similar history of abuse. And yesterday, he started purring. Like a full-on alpha purr.”
I should probably shut up and not spill any more of James’ business, but I needed someone to talk to about this. Someone to confirm my suspicions.
I didn’t want to be caught off guard if anything changed when we did take our relationship to the physical level.
“It’s rare but not unheard of,” Julian spoke up. “The damage an abusive childhood can have is not just physical or even mental. It can have devastating effects on hormones and the development of the brain. I think knowing what we do about James, this fits that mold of someone whose alpha hormones and genetics were repressed and haven’t developed until he met his omega.”
Until he met me.
The unsaid truth hung heavy in the air, and it was just another revelation that I had to come to terms with.
“Okay. Great.” My voice squeaked in a high tone as I tried not to panic.
“Deep breaths,” Alena was calm. “There’s no pressure for you to do anything you aren’t ready for. James and those guys would never force you to do anything before you were ready.”
I let out a deep sigh. “I know, Alena. I’m coming to terms with the fact that they’re my mates. You know how it is. You get so stuck in your head and lost in your past that it’s difficult to respond to situations in a reasonable amount of time.”
“Tell them that.” She made it sound so simple. “They’ve shared their pasts with you. You’ve only shared bits and pieces of yours. Maybe it’s time you all have a nice, long talk about things?”
“Yeah, probably.” Not. That would be a conversation that was entirely too uncomfortable. Although I knew it probably needed to happen. I wassonot good at expressing my thoughts or emotions.
“Stop avoiding it because it might be awkward, bestie. I promise once you’ve talked, it’ll heal something within you.” Alena snipped at me knowingly. “Didn’t something shift in your mind after James told you about his past?”
I rolled my eyes, knowing she couldn’t see it. I grumbled under my breath but didn’t outright answer her.
Alena laughed. “You don’t want to admit I’m right. Ha!”
“Go back to your sexy mates.”
