Page 96 of Now That It's You
Chloe shrugged. “I’ve had a lot of time to think these last few weeks. You’re right, his competitive nature probably drove a lot of it. Not just with relationships, but with everything in his life.”
“How do you mean?” She probably shouldn’t be probing like this, but Chloe’s theory made her curious.
“Take Kyle, for instance.”
“Okay.” Meg crossed her fingers nothing in her face gave away the arc that shot through her at the mention of his name.
If Chloe saw anything, she didn’t let on. “It just always seemed like Matt had this brotherly competition going on in his mind with Kyle—who had the most career success, who had the nicer car, who had the most notches on his bedpost. And the thing is, I don’t think Kyle even knew they were competing.”
“He didn’t,” Meg said, too quickly, perhaps. Did she have any right to speak for him? But she knew with absolute certainty she was right. “Kyle’s not the competitive type,” she added.
“And then with you—” Chloe swallowed, seeming to consider her words for the first time. “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but Matt always kept tabs on you.”
“Really?” A funny roar filled Meg’s ears, and she felt herself twisting her fingers into tighter knots.
“He didn’t stalk you or anything,” Chloe said quickly, turning to straighten a framed photo on the wall. Her family, from the look of it. “It wasn’t like that. But sometimes he’d be distant, so I’d check his internet browser to see if there was something suspicious going on. And I’d see that he’d been looking at your Facebook page.”
“But we weren’t even friends,” Meg protested. “Facebook friends, I mean. Matt’s whole family unfriended me right after the split.”
“I know. But you must not have your profile locked down tight?”
“That’s true.”
“And you still had mutual friends in real life. Every now and then I’d hear him ask them about you. He wanted to know if you were seeing anyone, if you’d found someone else.”
Meg bit her lip and studied Chloe’s face, expecting to see anger or bitterness or jealousy, but none of that appeared. Her eyes were watery and red-rimmed, but not angry.
She thought about Kyle, wondering how hurt she’d be if she found him lurking on Cara’s Facebook page or asking around about old girlfriends.
Then again, maybe everyone checked up on exes. God knows she’d done it at first, though she hadn’t gone near Matt’s social media for over a year. She hadn’t even known about Chloe until a few weeks ago.
“That must have been awkward for you,” Meg said, not sure what else to offer. “Having him show an interest in an ex.”
“Not as awkward as you might think. I wasn’t threatened by you, honestly.”
“I—um, I’m glad?” Meg bit her lip, unsure of the correct responses to anything. This whole conversation was new territory for her, like visiting a foreign country populated only by women who’d loved the same man she had.
Chloe just shrugged. “I don’t mean that in a snarky way. Just that I never got the sense he was checking up on you because he wanted you back. He was checking up on you because he wanted to be sure he was happier. That his life was going better than yours was. He wanted to know the choices he’d made had landed him in a better place than the ones you’d made had done for you.”
“I didn’t realize we were competing.”
Chloe laughed. “You were always competing. Everything was always a competition for Matt, wasn’t it?”
“I guess so.”
Meg’s head spun, and she couldn’t decide whether this whole conversation was enlightening or depressing. Either way, Chloe didn’t seem bothered.
“I think it would irritate me,” Meg admitted. “Knowing someone I loved was checking up on someone he used to be with. I don’t think I could be as cavalier about it as you are.”
Chloe shrugged. “That’s the difference between us. I’d rather know about all the skeletons in the closet. I’d rather throw all the baggage on the bed and open it up to see what’s inside so I know how to deal with it.”
“That’s very adult of you.”
“I try.” She turned away. “Come on. Speaking of going through baggage, I guess you’d better get started. File cabinet’s in here.”
She led Meg down the hall, headed toward the last room on the right. Meg knew it well. It had been their office, too, back when she lived here with Matt.
They’d bickered for months over the perfect paint color, finally ending up with a pale mint-green he’d chosen when she left town for a weekend wine tour with her mom. They’d jokingly dubbed it “the baby’s room,” their heads swimming with visions of rocking chairs and cribs and the possibility of starting a family someday. In the interim, it had remained an office and a guest room and a catchall for clutter and extra furniture and the hovering ghosts of all their dreams.
