Page 27 of Opening Strain

“Darren was no better,” I challenge.

“You’re right. He certainly was the joker of your band, ready to lead the next prank.” A wistful smile crosses her face. Then her shoulders straighten. “He was the complete opposite of me.”

Her observation seems spot-on. Opposites attract and all. Still. She’s more akin to me, although we show it in different ways. No need to share this nugget with my physical therapist. “Darren was the life of any party.”

She tidies up the room. “Well, I think we’re done for today. Feel ready to go home?”

I follow the whirlwind change in conversation and agree.

“If you wait here for a few minutes, I’ll collect my things and show you the back elevator, so you’ll know where to meet me tomorrow morning.”

Coming to a sitting position, I say, “Thanks.”

We take the back elevator down to the street level, then exit the building. The privacy here is exactly what I need. I appreciate herthoughtfulness. “This will be perfect. I’ll give you a five-minute heads up before I arrive.”

We walk a few steps. “How’s the leg?”

I query my limb. “It’s not hurting too much.”I’d give it about a six.

“Want me to drive you to your house?”

Because her tone is open and not sympathetic, I agree. We get into her Lexus SUV—grab bars are my friends—and I direct her toward my rental, to which we pull up minutes later.

“I’m happy you found something nearby.” She puts her vehicle into park.

“Me too. I let King and Angie pick the one nearest your clinic.”

“As in the Huntes?”

“Yeah. I’ve met his father and brother, but I hadn’t met King until now. Angie said you two are in the same Chamber of Commerce?”

“We are. They seem nice, but I haven’t had too much interaction with them.”

My fingers curl around the door handle, not excited at the prospect of eating all alone. Being by myself allows too many thoughts to swirl—ones I don’t want to revisit. “Want to join me for dinner?” I replay my ask, realizing I sounded desperate. What would Darren say?Do Not Fuck list, remember?I force the mask over my face again. “I’ll be going out, not cooking. But you don’t have to join me, if you have other plans.”

“I actually do.” She bites her lower lip. “I usually get together with Ma once a week, and tonight’s her night.”

“I get it.” Although I don’t. Her connection to her mother is foreign to me. However, I do need to come clean to her about one thing. “Darren was blown away by you, you know. He couldn’t believe his luck when you agreed to go out with him. Even on the night he, well, you know, he was proud you were on his arm. I wanted to be sure you knew this.”

She stares at the steering wheel. “As I said before, Darren was my total opposite, with his big personality and oversized thirst for adventure.I’m a homebody, Bennett, an introverted one at that. I think I was caught up in his aura. He made me feel special.”

Because you are. I keep this errant thought to myself. “He had a way about him, for sure.” He was the first guy to cheer from the sidelines. When I got my GED, he led the charge to celebrate my accomplishment. He saw life as a big adventure to be enjoyed to the fullest.

“He did,” Jenna agrees. “Those days are long over for me. I need someone safe, who doesn’t rock the boat.” She sighs. “Who follows instructions.”

This last statement makes me think she somehow blames herself for Darren’s actions. I turn in my seat. “I’m sure Darren forgot he took pills before he went drinking that night.” He never seemed like he was addicted to them, although looking back, his behavior did become erratic following his injury.

She smacks the steering wheel. “I told him not to drink. He was on oxy, which you shouldn’t mix with alcohol. Why couldn’t he listen to me?”

Her anger speaks to me. “Don’t blame yourself. We were touring with him and should’ve picked up the signals. In the end, it was his decision.” Shitty one, but his.

“He made me believe in more, you know? Truth is, someone like me needs to stay in my lane and not try to be part of a worldwide phenomenon.” She shakes her head. “This is where I belong. I’ve carved a nice life for myself in Aroostook. I have two clinics now, you know. With a third one in the works.”

“I think we all can be whatever we want to be. It seems to me you enjoy physical therapy and working with patients, so that’s a great reason for you to stay here.”

“Exactly.”

Is she trying to convince herself? Not going there. “Well, I better go. Enjoy dinner with your mother. See you in the morning?” I open the car door.

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