Page 9 of One Shameless Weekend

The tell-tale sound of a coke-head sniff pierces the line, and my skin crawls like it always does. “I got a bill from the dentist, and I need a hundred bucks to pay it.”

Oh right, he’s been going to thedentist.

“I just gave you five hundred last week,” I snap, albeit quietly. “Did you already fucking snort that too?”

“Nah.” Another sniff. I fucking hate my life, and I hate myself, and I hate my worthless baby brother almost as much as I love him. “I used that to pay for cabs to my meetings.”

“Oh really? You’re suddenlycabbingto your meetings? I guess you’re too good for the subway now, huh?” I grip my hand into a fist and fight the urge to slam it on the desk. “And if you spent it oncabs, why are you fucking sniffling like you’ve got a goddamn cold?”

“‘Cuz Idohave a cold.”

“Bullshit.” I shove the chair back from the desk and start pacing. “It’s the middle of summer. How the hell do you have acold?”

He scoffs. “Colds are caused byviruses, not the weather. I probably caught it from someone on the subway on my way to work, which is why I need to cab to my meetings.”

“You are so full of shit.” Heisfull of shit, and I doubt he’s even been into workorhis meetings. But I’ve got a solution to this problem, and I just need to placate him until I set everything into motion. Dropping back into the chair, I shake the mouse to wake up my screen and click over to my investments site. “Listen to me like your life depends on it, Archer. Because it does.”

“Jesus.I’m listening.Shit.” Another sniff.

Fuck. Me.

“I’m leaving on Friday to go to Isla's big engagement party weekend. I won’t be back until Sunday night, and you need to handle your own shit for two days. Think you can manage that?”

“I’ll need some cash, Colin,” Archer whines like he’s still eight fucking years old.

“I’m going to give you some,” I grit through clenched teeth. “I am going to transfer some to you, and you’re going to have to make it last because I won’t be available until I get back in town. I’ve got a major deal in the works with Ernesto, and I can’t fuck it up by constantly having to babysit you over the phone. You got that?”

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.Shit.”

“Also,” I hiss, pitching forward in the chair, “when I get back, you and I are going to have a long conversation. We are going to make some arrangements because I’m done with you living off my goddamned tit. Do you hear me?”

A laugh wheezes out of him. “You’ve got tits now? This I gotta see.”

“Fuck you, freeloader. I’m dead fucking serious.”

“All right, all right, all right,” he mumbles. “What’s the arrangement gonna be?”

“We’ll discuss it when I get back.” I scroll through the screen and click to transfer funds to the account I set up for him right after I graduated from college and started my first job. Right after our parents were killed in the accident that our piece of shit dad caused. Right after supporting Archer and his destructive lifestyle becamemyproblem instead of theirs.

Have I mentioned that I hate my fucking life?

I hate my fucking life becauseIhave never actually had my own life.

But that’s going to change, and soon, thanks to Señor Ernesto Reyes and his media empire, the engagement of his eldest daughter, and Miss Elle Kissinger, who still has no idea that she’s the linchpin to my freedom from all of this.

“Okay,” I say with one last click. “You’ve got two grand. Do not call me again until Monday. Do not go anywhere except work and your meetings. Don’t do anything stupid, or there will be no arrangement and no more money in your account. Are we one-hundred-percent clear?”

Another fuckingsniff, and who am I kidding? This will never work. It never does.

Nevertheless, Archer replies, “Yeah-yeah-yeah. Promise. Thanks, Colin. Love you.”

I grip my tie and jerk it sideways and upward as if hanging myself. “Love you, too. Behave yourself, Archer.”

“I will.”

He hangs up, and so do I, and he’s not going to behave himself, and I want to punch the fucking wall of glass behind me.

But I don’t have time to punch the glass, so I print out Elle’s review paperwork instead.

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