Page 45 of Shameless in Vegas

Maybe mixing the sleeping pill with tequila shots was a bad idea. After all, thereisa warning label on them that says to not take them with alcohol, and now I feel a little like a piece of shit.

“Querida,” I say gently, but firmly. “Look at me, baby doll. Open your eyes. You’re not all there right now, and I need you to try to wake up and look at me.”

She sucks in a gasp and grabs my wrists while I’ve still got my hands on her cheeks, and her eyes fly open. “If you hurt me, I will kill you. I will kill you before you can kill me.”

Her smoky-blue eyes are glassy and vacant, but her words that blatantly reference all her secret plans are a goddamn trigger, and anger nearly blinds me.

I slide my hands from her cheeks to wrap around her neck. I’m not going to hurt her. I’m not the violent person in this fucked up marriage.Sheis, and the chaos of this drug-induced episode is enough to push me over the edge and confront the secrets we’re both hiding from each other.

“You’re not gonna fucking kill me, Natalia,” I growl, gripping her neck; nothard,justenough. Her vacant eyes drift into line with mine. “But you are gonna tell me exactly why you’re here. I already know because I found the phone, and you’re gonna fess the fuck up right now.”

Her nails claw at my wrists as she wriggles and writhes beneath where I have her pinned down with my knees spreading her thighs apart. “If you hurt me, I will kill you.”Her words slur together like she’s speaking in cursive letters, and her eyes are even more glassy, now filling with actual tears.“I will kill you before you can kill me.”

I grab her hands and trap them against the pillow. “No, you fuckingwon’t, you conniving, two-faced, bitch. I will—”

“You will do nothing! You won’t do it again! I will kill you before you do it again, you evil piece of shit!”

“I haven’t done anything to you!”

I’m straight-up screaming back at her now, and this situation suddenly makes absolutely no sense. She’s incoherent, and now I am, too. She’s squirming, and I’m using my whole body to trap her flat against the mattress.

“I’ll kill you,” she wails, quieter now as her strength seems to be weakening against my hold. “If you do it again, I’ll kill you. I’ll snap your neck and rip out your throat.” An exhausted, defeated sob bursts out of her. “If you do it again, I’ll kill you.”

“I haven’t doneshitto you, Natalia,” I hiss through gritted teeth. “I’m the guy who didn’t remember marrying you, but still rescued you from shit youlied about, and brought you here, and all the while, you’re conspiring to take down my father’s fortune andmurder me. So if you’re going to blubber about something, it better be fessing the fuck up about why you’re really here, and telling me exactly what all you’re planning with my sociopathic, slimeball cousin.”

Another guttural wail hurls itself out of her throat, and she squeezes her eyes shut. “If you do it again, I’ll kill you, Xavier.Eres el diablo, cabron. Hombre malvado.You will pay with your life for what you did to me and for what they did to my mother.”

“Ineverdid…” I start to snap at her, but then clarity breaks through as her use of my cousin’s name is hurled against my frontal lobes like a hammer smacking sheet metal.

She’s hallucinating. She doesn’t know what’s happening, and she doesn’t even realize it’smeholding her down and not my sadistic cousin.

I saw every threat he made to her in the long thread of text messages, and now I can’t help thinking about what exactly is the nature of the relationship between them. I know how the cartel operates with their soldiers, I know they’re no strangers to violence, but I’m suddenly wondering about how they deal with women who work for them. Before encountering the phone last night, it never even occurred to me that women were involved in the more violent aspects of their business dealings, and now I’m suddenly wondering if Natalia’s relationship with the cartel is even her choosing.

“Natalia,” I say, lowering my voice and loosening my grip on her hands, but still holding them against the pillow. “What’s my name?”

Her whole body is shaking so violently it almost looks like a seizure. Tears are streaming so thick down her temples that her hair is soaked and matted against her scalp. Her bottom lip is trembling, teeth chattering, and the sobs keep coming.

“Xavier Reyes,” she sputters. “El diablo. Hombre malvado.”

The pang of dashed hope reverberates in my chest, but now it’s less about that and more righteous indignation and disgust for my sadistic cousin and what he’s probably done to her. Because, lest I fucking forget, I’m trapped in love with this woman against my own friggin’ will. Don’t get me wrong, even though I love her, Natalia is still my enemy, and she’s still going to jail. I’ll see to that if it’s one of the last things I do.

But…

I’m cursed with an innate protectiveness of women, and—for better or worse—that seems to include this conniving, murderous, two-faced wife of mine.

I release her hands and brace my forearms on either side of her head. “Take a deep breath, Natal—”

“Malvado,” she continues to mumble through her chattering teeth, her body quaking with fear beneath mine. “Malvado… malvado… malvado… violador.”

Violador.

Rapist.

Becauseof coursemy disgusting cousin has done something like that. To not only Natalia, but probably dozens of other women.

After all, Ignacio, the cousin I gunned down eight months ago, was responsible for sending thugs to rape Isla, which was half the reason I didn’t hesitate to take his ass out.

That’s what these fuckers do.

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