Page 118 of If This is Love

A car horn blared from out of nowhere, shaking me to my core, and everything was suddenly gone.

And at least I told her.

Thank God I told her.

32

RUTH

WAREHOUSE DISTRICT, NEW ORLEANS

Everything moved in slow motion. The car speeding through the intersection, slamming the brakes and blaring the horn, and Gabe freezing up like a deer in headlights.

The horn yanked him out of his mind, and he just stood there. Turned his head in the direction of the car, and that was it. The screech of tires. The sickening sound of all manner of impacts and collisions, and the unbelievable sight of Gabe being tossed like a rag doll onto the street.

Gunnerhowled.

He took off like a bolt of lightning, sprinting to Gabe, sniffing around his head, and then turning to look directly at me while he woofed like I’d never heard him woof.

Move your damn feet, girl!he seemed to be hollering at me, and I staggered forward.

“Jesus.”

There was no way. This did not just happen right in front of my own goddamn eyeballs.

I was almost to him. Gunner was wailing.

“Help me, Jesus.”

He was lying on his back, and his face looked alarmingly pale.

No.

No, this did not just happen.

Pastor, respectfully, that’s just not true. It was a car accident, and you’ve all been treating me like I’m the reason it happened.

I blinked, and I was in my old living room the day I got the phone call that brought me to my knees.

Ruth, he never would’ve been driving around the backroads of Texas looking for a property if you hadn’t planted these ideas in his mind. That boy already had a calling on his life tothis church. You put him outside of the will of God by giving him these wild ideas, and that put him in harm’s way. And that’s why we’re doing any of this on Sunday morning instead of having our behinds in church where we belong.

But, Pastor, forgive me, that may all be true, but I can’t repent for this. I didn’t do any—

And that spirit of rebellion is exactly why you’re now a widow at twenty-four years old.

I blinked again, and I was kneeling on the asphalt with one hand on Gabe’s chest. It was subtly rising and falling, and a silent shout of joy ricocheted in my heart and mind.

“Gabe,” I said through a shaky voice. “Baby, can you hear me?”

Gunner continued to sound his alarm, yowling and panting while he paced in circles around Gabe’s head. I saw red. There was blood. I didn’t know what to do. I leaned farther over him and saw more blood. Enough that it scared me so badly that I lay my cheek on his chest and cried. Silently and helplessly.

My whole body was shaking, but his was so still.

People were starting to surround us.

“Ruth… darlin’… can you give me your hand, sweetheart?” Brennan’s honeyed, southern inflection had never felt more like a warm hug on a cold day, and I managed to right myself, though I wasn’t sure which way was up. His warm hand clasped around mine, and another hand went to my back while he helped me stand.

“Here, hon. Let’s wrap you up. You’re shivering.” Liza was suddenly there, too, draping his suit jacket around my shoulders, and then Brennan immediately got on his knees to check on Gabe with focused, fastidious hands. She rubbed her hands up and down my arms and shushed like she did with her little Savannah.

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