Page 67 of Obligation
“When? And how many times?” Tiffany asked.
“Like, three or four times.” She cringed, waiting for her friend’s outburst, but Tiffany remained calm as promised. “At his penthouse after the bonfire. Things got pretty heated.” Her face and neck flamed with warmth at the memory of just how hot things had gotten. “And again today when you found us in the hallway.”
“Wow.”
Carissa shifted on her feet, guilt pooling in her gut. “Wow? That’s really all you have to say?”
“I’m still processing,” Tiffany said.
Rubbing her hands over her face, Carissa groaned. “I know. I’m an awful person. I have no right to kiss Bradley when I’m still with Danny. I just… I don’t know. I can’t explain it, but I’m drawn to him.”
“First, you’re not an awful person. Danny’s been messing around behind your back for how long? And with how many different girls?”
Carissa shrugged.
“Exactly. You’ve kissed exactlyoneguy. You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about.” Tiffany moved closer and held Carissa’s gaze. “I don’t know what happened, but everyone can see that Danny’s changed. He’s not the same guy he was when you met him, and honestly… None of us understand why you’re still with him.”
Frowning, Carissa shifted again. Not because she was physically uncomfortable, but because she knew sooner or later, her friends would start to wonder and ask questions. None of them were stupid—they’d noticed too much, and Carissa would have to explain eventually. She just wasn’t sure if she was ready to do that tonight.
“I love him,” she mumbled lamely.
“I know you do, and I know he’s your first real relationship, but c’mon, Carissa.” Tiffany cocked her head, sympathy masking her concern. “You don’t owe him anything. You don’t need to stand by him when he’s treating you like this.”
“It’s complicated, okay? And I don’t want to talk about it right now.” Carissa shoved away from the counter.
“Fine, but when you’re ready, I’m here.”
Carissa didn’t say anything further. She knew Tiffany would be available whenever Carissa was ready to talk, but that time wasn’t tonight. Might not be tomorrow, either. Or ever. She hadn’t been able to come to terms with everything that happened—no way could she tell anyone else and have them understand.
She returned to the living room, and the game resumed. She hadn’t been interested before, and she wasn’t now, either, but staring aimlessly at the TV was better than listening to her thoughts.
Deep down, she knew Tiffany was right. Carissa shouldn’t feel guilty about kissing Bradley when Danny was doing much more than that with other girls. Yet, Carissa did feel guilty. She wasn’t a cheater, and she hated that Danny had turned her into that type of person. And the fact that she was sitting there attempting to justify her actions only made her feel worse. Two wrongs didn’t make a right, and she was no better than Danny in terms of being loyal and faithful.
Halfway through the third quarter, she finally got a message from Danny. She opened her texts, her stomach in a knot at whatever he sent her.
Danny: Sorry I didn’t come over earlier. Got caught up with something. Can we please talk now?
She stared at her phone, her emotions wreaking havoc with her common sense. Last time he’d said he “got caught up with something,” he’d been with another girl—and Carissa had been suffering from a miscarriage. Alone. Had Danny been with another girl tonight, too?
The urge to accuse him of that consumed her, but she decided right then and there to find her way back to the woman she used to be pre-Danny. So, instead, she replied with: Sure. At your house now watching the game. Come here?
Danny: I think we need to talk alone.
Her brow furrowed, and the knot in her stomach tightened.
Carissa: When and where?
Her fingers trembled, and everything she’d eaten threated to make a reappearance. Sweat beaded on her brow, and dizziness swept her away. She momentarily closed her eyes and focused on centering herself.
“You okay?” Garrett asked, eyes narrowed.
“Yeah,” she said and licked her lips. Then she stood. “I, um, I… have to go.”
She rushed out the front door, ignoring the sound of her friends calling after her. They’d want an explanation, and knowing they already questioned her relationship to Danny, she wasn’t about to tell them she was leaving to go meet him.
By the time she got into her car and started the engine, she had another text from Danny with a time and place to meet—in front of the cafeteria in fifteen minutes. Driving back to campus wouldn’t take that long, but the extra time would hopefully help calm her nerves.
She had no idea what Danny wanted to talk about, but she knew what she needed to say, what was weighing too heavily on her heart and mind. Tonight was the night she’d make things right. She’d finally tell him everything she’d been feeling, every bad thought she had, including how she felt about their relationship moving forward.
