Page 69 of Obligation
“I know. I never wanted to hurt you, either.”
He smiled, a bitter laugh escaping. “Yet, here we are.” He held his arms out to his sides, then let them drop, his palms smacking against his thighs. “Seems all we do is hurt each other.”
She wanted to remind him that he hurt her more than she’d ever hurt him, but she bit her tongue. Saying that wouldn’t solve anything and only cause more problems.
“You scare me, Danny,” she blurted before she lost her nerve. “When you get mad, and we argue… You say and do things that terrify me. Like leaving me at the bonfire.” She hugged herself and resisted the urge to shiver. “All my friends had already left. My phone was broken.” Her voice hitched.
“That was a dick thing to do. I know that, and I can never tell you how sorry I am. For what it’s worth, I did go back, but you were already gone.” He scrunched up his face. “Tiffany told me you were safe, and that made me feel better, but… where were you?”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. Should she tell him the truth? His behavior right now was confusing, to say the least, but was he being genuine? Could she be totally honest and continue to have a meaningful conversation with him? Or would he flip out on her like he usually did?
“Bradley found me,” she said, hoping Danny would accept that answer and drop the subject. She should’ve known better.
“My roommate Bradley?”
She nodded.
Danny narrowed his eyes, his jaw tensing. “So, you were with him all weekend?”
“Yes.” She cleared her throat. “But nothing happened.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t for lack of trying on his part,” Danny mumbled.
The hair on the back of her neck rose with a mix of fear and uncertainty. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, please.” Danny huffed. “I’ve seen how he looks at you.” He shook his head with disgust. “He wants you, Carissa, and I’ve given him the perfect opening.” He muttered a string of curses under his breath.
Carissa tensed. Danny was a lot more observant than she’d given him credit for, and now she couldn’t help but wonder who else had noticed the weird tension between her and Bradley.
“He’s a friend,” she said with emphasis. “Nothing more.”
The lie tasted bitter on her tongue. She might not ever get another chance to be completely open and honest with Danny, and rather than seizing the opportunity, she was piling one lie on top of another. But what guarantee did she have that Danny wouldn’t flip some invisible switch and become that guy who frightened her?
“I have no idea what to do anymore.” Danny wandered toward one of the stone benches that lined the wall outside the cafeteria building. He propped his elbows on his knees and dropped his head into his hands. “I’ve fucked up so bad, and I don’t know how to fix it.”
Carissa’s resolve softened, and she sat next to him. “You need help, Danny. Professional help. You need to deal with our loss and get control of your temper.” Cautiously, she rested her hand on his arm.
He dropped his hands from his face and turned to look at her. Tears pooled in his eyes. “I know.” He sat up straight. “And I’m willing to do all of that. I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right between us.”
She gave him a genuine smile. Hope bloomed in her chest. Maybe this was a turning point for them. “And I’ll support you all the way,” she promised.
Even if they didn’t—or couldn’t—save their relationship, she wouldn’t go back on that promise. Danny needed someone in his corner, someone he could count on to help him help himself. She’d be that person for him, because deep down to her core,thatwas the type of person she was, and she’d fight with everything in her to get that girl back.
“Thank you.” He took her hand and kissed her knuckles. “So, what does this mean for us?”
She licked her suddenly dry lips. Her heart thundered, and her stomach twisted with nerves. Now was her chance to say what had been on her mind, but now that the moment had arrived, she wasn’t sure she could form the words.
“I think…” She took a deep breath and eased her hand from his. She wiped her sweaty palms on her legs. “I think we should take a break. Just until you get the help you need.”
His eyes darkened, and she scooted away a little, then angled her body toward his. If she couldn’t make him understand what she meant, this conversation would explode into an argument.
“You want to break up?” he asked, his tone tight.
“Just until you get better,” she said, her voice pleading. “I think it will be better for both of us. You can focus on dealing with your grief and anger, and I can focus on me. Neither of us are the same people we were a year ago. You have to know that.”
“I do,” he admitted, though a little reluctantly.
“When we first met, things were amazing. We were great together,” she said with a sad smile. “But now, all we do is fight and say things to hurt each other. We both need to find ourselves again so we can get back to the way we used to be. I miss that. I miss us.” Her voice dropped to a whisper.
