Page 91 of Forget Me Not

Julia

Panic erupted inside. Julia had left him.

She was gone.

And he didn’t know where to find her.

Chapter Thirty-One

“Your father is not unkindto you, is he?” Digby asked.

He, apparently, noticed Julia’s nervousness growing as they approached Farland Meadows.

“I do not know if he will be pleased to see me, but he will not raise a hand to me.”

Digby reached across the carriage and set his hand on hers. “Then why do you look scared?”

“We did not part on good terms.” She released the pent-up air in her lungs. “I tried to convince him not to force me into the marriage he had arranged. He was not as patient with me as Lord Lampton was with Lucas.Hewas permitted to make a great many arguments without being called selfish or being made to feel despised.”

“Lucas might have downplayed the harshness of his father’s reaction.”

She knew Digby was attempting to ease her worries, and she appreciated it. “I overheard his conversation with his father. Lucas was not berated. I was fileted.”

“Tension between parent and child is rather miserable, isn’t it?” He spoke as one who knew. “I’ll stay with you until you know for certain he will welcome you home once more.”

“And if he doesn’t?”

Digby sat back once more. “I suspect there will always be a place for you at Lampton Park.”

“Lord and Lady Lampton will take Lucas’s part,” she whispered. “My father might also. I simply have to find my own place, wherever I can carve it out.”

Was it so much to ask that there be a place in this world where she would be warmly received, where she would be so desperately wanted that she could have confidence in her value there?

When something is important enough, one does what must be done. One doesn’t allow anything to stand in the way.What she wouldn’t give to be that important to someone.

“I wish, Digby, I could tell you that my father will be kind to you,” she warned. “He is not an unkind person, nor one inclined to anger, but he may be too upset with me for civility, even to you.”

“He was vastly civil the last time I saw him.”

She had not expected that answer. “When have you met him before?”

“At your brother’s funeral.”

Her lungs emptied. “You were at Stanley’s funeral?”

There was something so heartbreaking about a sad smile on the face of someone who always looked happy. “He was one of us, Julia. Of course we were here.”

That had been such a harrowing time. She only vaguely remembered which of her neighbors had been at Stanley’s services or had called at Farland Meadows to offer their condolences. It made sense she would not remember any strangers who had been present.

“We were all nearly overwhelmed by grief,” Digby said. “But Lucas was utterly devastated. He hasn’t been the same since.” He smoothed his jacket as the carriage pulled to a stop in front of the house. “These past weeks at Brier Hill, we’ve seen more of the old Lucas at last: genuinely laughing, not hiding behind feigned lightness, wanting to travel but not as a means of running away. We’re worried less about him now.” He met her eyes again. “But now, we’re worried aboutyou.”

“No need, Your Majesty.” She did her best to smile. “I am back where I ought to have been all along.” The role of quiet, isolated daughter suited her better than unwanted, unvalued wife. She would settle back into it quickly and pretend she’d never imagined herself as anything more.

The carriage door opened, they having reached the front portico of the house. She sat a moment, solidifying her determination.

“It’s not too late to simply return to Brier Hill,” Digby said. “We made the journey here in two days. We can make the journey back just as quickly.”

She shook her head. “There’s no place for me there.”

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