Page 82 of Snapdragons
“I am well aware that I don’t make much of an impression at all. I would be more concerned about that if I didn’t prefer to receive little notice.”
They rode across the land bridge to the lake island with its natural beauty and elegant gazebo. Niles had always liked it on his previous visits to Pledwick Manor, but it had grown particularly special to him on this visit. And that had everything to do with it having been part of every ride he’d taken with Penelope.
“Why?” she asked without warning as they reached the island.
“Whywhat?”
“Why do you prefer to be unnoticed?”
His mind was wandering, which was unusual for him. Penelope had pulled them back to the topic they’d been discussing.
“There is a certain freedom,” he said, “that comes with not being the center of attention.” He dismounted, then gave Morwenna a quick pat. “When people forget I am present, they’re far less likely to expect me to be a certain person or act a certain way. I’ve learned to appreciate that.”
Penelope allowed him to help her dismount as well. Holding her, even for the brief time needed to lift her to the ground, sped his pulse. It was a heady feeling, one he didn’t want to lose.
“Do you think, perhaps,” she said once her feet were firmly on the ground, “that you’ve tucked yourself away as much as you have in the hope that your family would forget you were there and stop trying to force you to live the life they have chosen for you?”
“Stanley once asked me the same question.” He took her hand, then walked with her along the gravel path.
“What answer did you give him?” she asked.
“I assured him that if I disliked being relegated to the shadows, I wouldn’t keep returning there. But I honestly prefer having a bit of space in which to think and be myself. And I enjoy watching people more than I enjoy being watched and listening more than doing the talking.”
“Then you havechosenyour quiet corner rather than having been banished to it.”
He looked at her. “Do you find that pathetic?”
“Not in the least.” She leaned her head lightly against his upper arm. “I appreciate that you’ve decided who you are and what you want, and you aren’t allowing people to force you into being anything else.”
“You’re doing the same,” he reminded her.
“Peas in a pod, you and I.”
Water lapped the edge of the island a few yards from where they walked. An early evening breeze rustled leaves and rippled the lake. The horses seemed quite content to remain where they were, nibbling at grass and standing about at their leisure. The setting was perfect for heartfelt confessions. He was still nervous though.
“I could not be more grateful that you made the journey to Yorkshire. Because of that, I was able to meet you and know you, despite having abandoned the original circumstances under which we were meant to meet.”
“I am choosing to believe that this isn’t leading to you saying you’d rather I left now.”
His stomach dropped. “Is that what it sounds like I’m about to say?”
She nodded.
He sighed. “Lands, I’m horrible at this,” he muttered.
“Atwhat, Niles?”
He stopped their forward progress and stepped in front of her, taking both her hands in his. “You have laid claim to the entirety of my heart, Penelope. I find myself thinking of you when we are apart and counting the hours until I’ll see you again. And when we are together, it’s all I can do not to abandon politeness and decorum and simply beg you to let me hold you regardless of who might be nearby. When I thought you might be returning to Ireland, I have seldom felt so dejected. And when you insisted you meant to remain...” He was struggling to find the words to express how he’d felt when she’d chosen to stay. “I wondered if I was a fool to have imagined the connection I felt between us. But you stayed, and I think—Ihope—you did so, at least in part, because you felt that connection too.”
Her hair was a bit windswept from their ride. Her smile wassmall but tender. “I do feel it. And I treasure it.”
“I have fallen wholly and unchangeably in love with you, and I couldn’t let another day go by without telling you that, without confessing to you how completely you have captured my heart.” Saying the words brought some relief but didn’t entirely ease his nervousness.
“I love you, too, Niles Greenberry.” She wrapped her arms around him as she spoke the words he had hoped to hear but hadn’t dared let himself expect. “Wholly and unchangeably.”
He held her, just as he so often wished he could. Breathed in the scent of orange blossoms that she wore, allowing himself to simply enjoy the feel of her in his arms. He would eventually have to ruin the moment by sharing the rest of what he needed to say.
“May I tell you a secret, Niles?”
