Page 28 of Worlds Apart
Errol laughed, then he fell silent when Martin didn’t join in. “What?”
“Denied, Carberry. They didn’t think I had enough permanent ties to Kenya to return.” Martin wanted to laugh. He wanted to cry. Sometimes his permanent ties to Kenya felt more like ropes binding him. He walked to United Nations Avenue and waited in the shade of a tree for his driver to circle the block and come pick him up.
“That’s ridiculous. What about all the other times you’ve traveled?”
“Apparently because I’m only going as a tourist—”
“So figure out some business reason to go to the States and see Sunny instead. Who cares? Martin, you’re mad for this woman. I’ve never seen you—”
“You think I want to go to a country that would treat me this way?” He glanced back at the growing line of people. “That would treat any Kenyan this way? It’s insulting. I don’t need to visit a place that doesn’t want me.”
“Sunny wants you.” Errol’s voice was suddenly serious. “And you want her. You’ve been happier the last three months than any other time I’ve known you. You’re in love with her. It’s worth it to—”
“I’ve been living in some fantasy.” He saw his driver crest the hill. “I’ve got to go. I’ll be back in the Mara tomorrow afternoon. Have one of the guides come pick me up on the 2:30 flight.”
He texted Sunny when he got in the car.Call me when you wake up.
She texted back immediately.I’m awake. How did the interview go? When are you coming?
Martin hesitated for a moment, then he hit the call button.
“Hey, how did it go?”
She sounded sleepy and sweet and Martin almost wanted to reassure her that he would fix it somehow, but there was nothing to fix. He wasn’t going to be visiting her in Virginia.
“They denied my tourist visa,” he said. “They think I’m at risk to overstay.”
She laughed, then like Errol, she realized he was serious. “Wait, what?”
“They think I’m going to overstay my visa, get a job driving a cab, and live in a house with a dozen other African migrants.”
“Did they say that?” She sounded horrified.
“Of course not, they didn’t need to. It was obvious from the official’s face what he was thinking.” Martin felt humiliated just telling her.
“Wait, they can’t—Is there some way you can appeal this? That’s ridiculous.”
“I agree.” He snapped at his driver to take him back to his apartment.
“What do you want to do? We can’t let one bureaucrat stop you from coming to—”
“Sunny, can you imagine yourself living in Kenya?” He blurted out the question that had been plaguing his mind for weeks. “Not just for a holiday, not for a summer or a season, but all of the time?”
The silence on the other side of the line was vast. For the first time, Martin felt the worlds between them. His life. Her life. His family obligations. Her family obligations. Two different lives. Two different futures.
“Because I can’t live in the United States,” he continued. “I don’t have a home there or a future there, and I’m never going to have one. My life is here. My home is here. My responsibilities are here. And I have many responsibilities. Do you understand that?”
She finally spoke, but her voice was small. “Yes. I understand that.”
“So what are we doing?” He felt his heart breaking as the silence on the other line dragged on. “We are not children.”
“What are you saying?” Her voice was barely over a whisper.
Whatwashe saying? His anger and his humiliation had collided with his pride. Every doubt his father had raised didn’t seem unreasonable now. His father was right. They lived in different worlds. Martin wanted a partner, a wife, a family. Not right away, but he was thirty-three. He didn’t have forever.
“I’m saying that while I have very strong feelings for you, I don’t have the time to devote myself to a relationship that has no future,” he said. “And neither do you. That’s not what I want. And you deserve a partner who can be there for you. Not just on the phone but in your life.”
“Are you breaking up with me?” She sounded lost and hurt. Martin was kicking himself, but he knew he was doing the right thing.
