Page 59 of The Life Experiment
As Layla continued recounting her day, Angus walked beside her, stroking his fingers back and forth on her arm as he listened. All the while, he lied to himself that he was worthy of Layla’s time, even though he knew, deep down, he wasn’t.
27Layla
The Life Experiment: Daily Questionnaire
Property of OPM Discoveries
How would you rate your level of contentment today? (1 represents low contentment, 10 represents high)
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
How would you rate your energy level? (1 being very low energy and 10 being very high energy)
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
What are two things you are grateful for today?
Living in London. I’ve never given myself time to appreciate all there is to do here, but now I’m hanging out with Angus, I see how amazing it is. We could do three activities every day and never run out of things to do. How incredible is that?
Dad’s texts. His photos are always blurry and he’s so slow at replying I almost forget we’re chatting, but I love the insights into his day
What are you struggling with today?
Going to work and acting like everything hasn’t changed. I need to figure out what to do about that, but how? All ideas welcome, Saira
Do you have any additional notes on what you would like to discuss in your upcoming counselling session?
Lifestyle changes that could help with my stress level. I’m debating a gym membership (I know, it’s a shock to me too!)
Glaring sunlight sliced through the office, not that anyone but Layla seemed to notice. They were too busy focusing on the screens in front of them as if they were the most important things in the world.
You’d have been like that a few weeks ago,Layla thought.
How Layla had changed.
On cue, a message from one of the reasons for that change pinged onto Layla’s phone. Opening it, a picture of a takeaway coffee with ‘Anus’ written on the cup filled her screen. The caption made her giggle.
I don’t know if the barista can’t spell or if they’re trying to insult me x
‘Stop,’ Rashida said as Layla typed a response. ‘You laughing in the office is making me uncomfortable.’ Rashida grinned to show she was joking, but Layla couldn’t laugh along.
Don’t let this place steal your happiness!she wanted to shout.Mayweather & Halliwell might charge clients exorbitant fees for your time, but they have no respect for it!
After sending her reply, Layla looked to Rashida. ‘Surely we shouldn’t be miserable at work? I know it can’t always be perfect, but we shouldn’t be so downtrodden we can’t find the energy to smile.’
‘Did you forget what this place was like while you were away? A defeated workforce is how leadership likes it. You’re less likely to rebel when you’re too tired to protest.’ Rashida chuckled, but Layla wondered if she heard the sadness in her words.
‘Surely we shouldn’t only feel good on payday?’
‘Layla, I have a son in day care and a mortgage. There’s no payday happiness for me.’
Another grim truth that tore through Layla. ‘Well, I still think management should work harder to support their staff.’
Dubiously, Rashida studied her colleague. ‘Maybe I need to take a trip up north. You’ve returned a new woman.’
Layla might have rolled her eyes, but even she could admit that there was an undeniable truth to Rashida’s observation. It was the strangest thing. Since finding out her death date – and with the help of a few nudges from Saira – Layla had stepped out from the shadow of her desk. The result had been transformative. Life in all its complex, amazing glory invited her to feel, enjoy and take part.
Sometimes the mix of conflicting emotions gave Layla a headache. The joy of Jayden’s laughter coupled with the sadness of knowing she didn’t have long to hear it. The rush of love she felt when sitting with her parents, knowing that their newfound closeness would bring them more pain when she was gone. The perfection of her friendship with Angus, knowing she could never allow it to become more.
