Page 59 of Lord of the Hollow Court
Rineke leaned over the padded arm of the chair, chin resting on her own arm at a curious angle. “How, then?”
“My mother, she liked to yell.” Katty looked at her hands. “All the time, really. I couldn’t do anything right. My sister, either. And she snored.” Katty sniffed. “I often thought my mother pitted us against one another.”
Rineke’s slim brows furrowed. “That’s awful.”
“That’s my mother.” Without meaning to, Katty had raised her shoulders and tightened her neck, as if being reprimanded for slouching. “My father, though, he was always quiet. Always trying to make peace. I didn’t appreciate him enough while I was under his roof.” She curled her hands in the bedding. “I dreamt of them, you know—my family. I want to go see them.”
Rineke coughed, an act that sent a spasm through her spring green and black wings. “That might be, erm, complicated.”
“Why? Aren’t I the Lady here?”
“Yes, you’ve been clear on that point,” Rineke said, no edge beneath her teasing that Katty could find. It was remarkable that Rineke could be so forgiving. She blushed at the thought of her behavior toward the faerie on her wedding day.
“I’m sorry, Rineke,” Katty let out all in one breath. “I don’t appreciate you enough, either. I’ve never really had friends. I was acompanionfor another girl”—Katty’s lip curled in distaste—"but I see now we were never truly friends."
Rineke clucked her tongue, eyes brightening. “She must’ve beensoawful.”
She was baiting Katty. And changing the subject, it may be. But Katty wanted to talk about this. If she couldn’t get someone to understand the place she had come from, how would they know what to teach her so she would belong here? It suddenly felt as if Katty had eighteen years of being wrapped in frayed ribbons and thorns to untangle. As it was, she barely had enough room to breathe.
“Katrina wasn’t awful,” Katty said somberly. A smile made her mouth twitch. “But she was the most boring person I’ve ever met. When she wasn’t singing or preening, she was talking about singing and preening. All her new ribbons, her dresses—she was spoiled, too. She’d toss her old things to me and say, “See if you like it,’ as if they’d cost nothing.” Erstwhile Katty rarely had anything new. The only reason she knew how fine her ankles were was a summer when she’d grown two inches and her hems began to show them.
To think of how she acted with Katrina, how much time she spent quietly seething and wishing her supposed friend ill, made Katty burn with shame now. There had to be a way to appear dignified without becoming haughty, yet Katty had never once sought it out. She’d loved the ribbons and dresses she’d received from Katrina, even though it also pained her to wear them. They were undervalued castoffs she’d been gifted, good enough for Katty because she was just a miller’s daughter.
“I was so jealous of her all the time,” Katty said. “The worst part is, if I wasn’t surrounded by all of this, I would be still.”
Rineke considered her words with due solemnity—then made apfftsound that rifled her bangs. Her wings fluttered slightly. “Fae get jealous all the time. We’re a passionate people. You’ll fit right in.”
“I’m being serious, Rineke.”
“Well, don’t be.”
“But I’m trying to apologize!”
“Accepted and forgotten. Shall we go see if supper is ready? I think I heard a knock a bit ago, but I was—deeply engrossed in my book.”
Katty laughed. “You were napping!”
“You can’t prove that.” As she looked at Katty, Rineke’s grin softened, then broke. “I hope you aren’t confessing all of this because you think you’re unfit to be our Court’s Lady. I’ve noticed how hard you are on yourself and—well, you’re not half bad, Katrina Braam. If you can be a half good Court’s Lady, I think we’ll all do alright.”
Katty shook her head no—then stopped. Something nagged at her, curdling in the back of her thoughts. If she wasn’t good enough as a miller’s daughter, how could she lead so many as a Court’s Lady? Strange to say, but Rineke was an optimist. Kattyknewshe’d make a terrible one. She would simply have to hope that Lord Braam had everything in hand. Perhaps she didn’t even need to appear at events very often—
“Katrina,” Rineke said, startling her. In some ways, it was difficult to believe that was her own name, so used to being called her childhood pet name was she. “You’re going to do fine. I know it.”
Katty narrowed her eyes at her friend. “You can’t possibly.”
“But I do!” Rineke pressed herself up from the arm of the chair, tossing the book aside as if it wasn’t that good anyway. “You care. If you’re going to be a Court’s Lady, that’s the thing that matters most. I mean, look at the Court of Claws. Every time a new staff member comes here from a position at Clawmark Castle, we get theworststories. Thank goodness his lordship thought of you to dissuade that awful Lady de Groot and her daughters from taking us over—”
“What?”
Rineke looked up sharply, green and black wings snapping to attention. Her eyes widened.
“Rineke. What did you just say?” Katty ripped the bed clothes away and swung her legs over the bedside. She was before Rineke in seconds, bare feet sinking into the nap of a plush carpet. Good Lord, it was difficult to stay angry when everything was so comfortable. Katty fought to hold onto her edge. “It sounded like you just said the Court of Claws is going to take over the Hollow Court, butI’mstopping it?”
Rineke set her teeth in an expression that did not near the territory of a smile. “I thought you knew.”
“I most certainly did not.” Katty searched her memories just to be certain.I have need for a bride, ideally a human one, for reasons I may explain to you.But Braam hadn’t, had he? With the whirlwind of the last two days, couldn’t he have taken a minute of time?
But Katty hadn’t let him. She was too wrapped up in her drive to be superior—that need her mother had instilled in her, sharp word by sharp word, always telling her she needed to act as though she were someone better. Her thoughts of their marriage ceremony in the Lord’s Grove began to take on an unpleasant cast. Somewhere between removing all the layers of Katty’s clothing and struggling back into them—both of them laughing because neither of them were sure how to do it right and her dress had the tiniest silver clasps and buttons on the back—he might have said,By the way, this might all go away and be replaced by something awful, if only you would be so kind as to stop it.
