Page 84 of The Reluctant Siren
“He’s definitely the me,” Ben agreed. “He’s the reasonableone who sees a lot of the social things you miss. I know you don’t want her togrow up but she’s going to, and she’ll do it with you or without you. You’refighting a battle you can’t win. Not without her losing. Do you want her tolose? Do you want her safe so badly you’re willing to keep her from the kind oflove you and I found?”
Chase’s expression said it all. He didn’t need to hearpsychic words to know that Chase Dawson had questioned whether he and Niallwere worth Harlow’s love.
The trouble was Jensen was asking the question himself.
“Is there any possibility of us getting back to the actualreason I’m out in the ass end of nowhere in the middle of the night? I know youthink this job of mine is a ridiculous rebellion and I’ll wake up one day andcome home, but I have to be undercover with a notorious drug kingpin in roughlysixteen hours,” Jack pointed out.
It was such a weird family dynamic. They were arguing butabout something important. Jensen hadn’t really known his dad, and when hetried to talk to his mom about anything that wasn’t puppies and kitties and howgreat it was to have that two liter of store-brand soda she had a coupon for,she dissolved into apologies and tears. He never had anyone he could get realadvice from. Someone who would argue with him. Even Tommy did what he wantedand hid his problems so no one had to be bothered by him.
Everyone except Niall.
Niall listened. Niall tried to force him to talk.
Niall would be good for Harlow.
“If I go into witness protection, do you think they wouldstill target Harlow?” Jensen asked.
No one was listening.
“Come on, Jack. I’m ribbing you because you haven’t beenhome.” Lucas had softened considerably. He leaned toward his son. “We miss you.Do you honestly think I would be up in the middle of the night if I didn’t wantto see you? If I didn’t worry this might be my only chance to see you? I had toargue with your mom and dad or they would be here, too.”
Jack sighed, a weary sound. “I’m not ducking you. I’mundercover. I can’t pop down to Deer Run to hang with the family. And I missyou, too.”
Chase seemed to lose whatever psychic discussion he washaving with his twin. He sat back, hands coming up. “Fine, but can we move themto Sanctum? I would feel better if they were in a secure location. I promise tonot visit at any time when our daughter might be pursuing…” He went slightlygreen. “…whatever she’s pursuing with these two.”
“Love,” Ben said with a sigh. “She’s pursuing love.”
She wouldn’t be pursuing it if she stayed with him. Shewould be on the run. She would be Hamilton’s prey. “This could take a while. Idon’t want Harlow stuck in some club when she should be out living her life.”
Finally, Chase turned his way. “You didn’t think it wouldlast this long before? You didn’t think bringing Hamilton to justice wouldn’ttake a couple of years? The wheels of justice move slowly. Apparently you needto watch moreLaw and Order. Lucas can give you a rundown.”
Nah, he was an asshole. Jensen could like an asshole, but hewasn’t in the mood tonight. He had shitty things to do and his own life toruin. But at least he could save the two people he loved. Sitting herelistening to all the ways Hamilton was putting him in a corner had sent a joltof reality through him.
He’d made this choice a long time ago. He’d chosen revengeover healing. He’d chosen revenge over her. If he’d walked away with her, hecould be out. He could have spent the last two years building something withher and when Niall met her and they all played at The Hideout…they would haveended up together. It might have been hard, but they would have gotten throughit. If he’d chosen differently, they might be married by now, and he could sitaround with Niall and listen to everyone argue and poke each other and knowthey were a part of this family.
Niall would be. Niall hadn’t made all the wrong choices.
Yeah, he definitely had more than one feeling, and they wereall hitting him right now. It had been easier when he was numb.
“I wasn’t turning him over to the police,” Jensen admitted.“It was going to be an easy job once I got close to Hamilton since I was goingto put a bullet through his brain.”
The room seemed to go still, and then Chase groaned.
“Damn it. I don’t want to like him,” Chase said.
Niall turned to Jack. “He wouldn’t have done it.”
He couldn’t let Niall smooth this over. Harlow’s life was onthe line. Her happiness was at stake. “I would have. I would do it today if youcould get me close enough. I could use that sniper rifle of yours, Jack.There’s a nice perch on the building across from where he’ll meet with hiscrew.”
“Yeah, I know exactly where you’re talking about.” Chaseleaned forward. “The top left corner of the building to the west. You’ve got aclear view of everyone going into and out of that building. What? Of course Ilooked into it. Maybe I wouldn’t have had time to if I was in Coloradoprotecting my family, but I was working through some anxiety. So I know the kidis right and we can snipe that motherfucker.”
Lucas’s head shook. “Do not talk about your crimes in frontof the lawyer. Have I not taught you that? And you’re literally talking aboutmurdering a man in front of an FBI agent.”
“At this point all I want is to clear the case and move myass back to a desk for a while.” Jack stood up. “But if you two are going tolive out Uncle Chase’s wildest dreams, I think I’m going to grab a nap, andI’ll head back to Dallas in the morning. I really do have a shift to work.”
Jensen couldn’t let that happen. Not without him. He wasn’tgoing to risk Harlow. “I’ll take you to my apartment and get you the data youneed. Your people didn’t find my thumb drive, did they, Jack?”
“No, you won’t.” Lucas sent him what Jensen was sure was thelook he sent all his clients who acted like dumbasses. “We’ll give him what heneeds when we have the immunity deal signed.”
