Page 53 of Love, Just In

A violent gust of wind pastes my loose hair to my face, and I swipe away the strands while Zac continues to stand in silence.

A throb of pain reverberates in my chest. This is not how I expected today to go or how I imagined Zac to be. I thought he’d want comfort, but he hasn’t let me, or anyone, hug him, and he’s barely said a word. Instead, everything he’s feeling is inscribed all over his hollow cheeks and lifeless eyes—he’s frozen with grief. I’ve never seen Zac in mourning before, and I guess this is how he handles it. He completely shuts down, and I don’t know how to help him.

‘Do you want to go somewhere after this?’ I offer gently. When I reach for his hand, his fingers echo every other part of him. They’re stiff and cold.

‘Thanks, but I’m just gonna go home,’ he mumbles, his hand falling back to his side.

‘Home as in your mum and dad’s?’

He nods. ‘I can’t go back to the Glebe house.’

Another sharp ache takes hold of me. ‘Of course. Do you want me to go there and get some of your things for you?’

He shakes his head, looking down. ‘Thanks, but it’s OK.’

‘Are you sure? I don’t mind at all.’

‘I said I don’t want you to.’

After a tense beat of silence, his gaze finally drags to mine, and I stare into his beautiful, tortured eyes,thrown by this tone that I’ve so rarely heard from Zac. But I get it—he’s angry at the world for stealing away his future wife. He has every right to be furious.

Zac’s chest expands with a long breath. ‘Sorry,’ he utters. ‘It’s not you. I promise.’

Before I can reply, his mum appears beside us, her brow lined and her movements tentative, but Zac immediately turns towards her.

‘Can we go?’ he asks her.

‘Of course, darling.’ She lays her fingers on his shirt sleeve and offers me a sympathetic smile. Mrs Jameson and I already said hello to each other before the service.

‘Thanks for coming, Josie,’ Zac says to me.

Then he’s gone.

CHAPTER 18

Today

Sitting at my desk with a takeaway coffee, I stare at the number in my phone for an eternity before sucking in a harden-the-hell-up breath and calling the office of Zac’s GP. Her books are full, but the softly spoken receptionist divulges that she’s been specifically asked to squeeze me in. My chest heats and swells. Zac must’ve called earlier this week, undoubtedly combining his natural charisma and honeyed voice to propel me to the top of the waitlist. The same way he managed to convince me to make this appointment that I’ve been avoiding for months.

Given I have a few reporting shifts coming up in Sydney, I book in a time for next week, my blood turning to ice over the medical tests I know I’m going to have to face. I’m just thanking the receptionist when my phone pings with a text from Lindsay.

LINDSAY:When do I get to see you again, gorgeous? x

The fact that he still wants to spend time with me, despite me being a bit hot and cold lately, makes me wonder if there’s something worth salvaging with Lindsay. I may not be madly in love with him just yet, but he’s sent so many sweet messages since the Newcastle Show that I decide to give him another shot. Plus, I need to keep my mind occupied.

ME:Soon, I promise. Work’s been kicking my ass lately, and I’ve been crashing out early, but it would be nice to see you.

LINDSAY:Poor thing. What’s been going on at work that’s got you so knackered? x

I reply by filling him in on how I’m trying to improve my showreel, which means working extra hours on voluntary feature stories like the one on flood prevention. Lola and I have also been putting together a feel-good feature about local kids writing personal ads for rescue dogs to help find them homes. I text Lindsay one of the adorable examples before he’s called into a meeting, and I put my phone away and pour my focus into work.

I’m an hour from finishing up for the day when Man-Bun-Colin dials up the volume on the police radio. There’s a house on fire in Mayfield with multiple units en route.

Meghan sits higher in her seat, but I’m the closest to Colin, and I want this story. My packages keep getting bumped to the bottom of the rundown, and something tells me this one’s going to lead tonight’s late news bulletin.

I rush at Colin like a bulldozer. ‘I can go cover it.’

The stars must be aligned in my favour, because not only does he grant me the story, but lazy-ass Gus is off sick so I’m paired with Gemma, our newest camera recruit, who’s still young enough that she’s willing to please. Lola pokes her head up over her computer and offers me a subtle thumbs-up that makes me giggle. No one knows the punishment of working with whingey Gus more than she does.

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