Page 12 of Dancing Fools and All That Jazz
‘No. No, I don’t. Ingrida, I want you to stay.’
He then put his other hand over mine.
‘I want you to stay. Always.’
My heart, it was pounding, and I could not find the words to answer. But then Neil, he kiss me, and I just knew, there and then, I belong there.
After this, I was surprised we did not make our union together. I began to think Neil, he want a relationship that is…platoniskiis the word in Latvian. But I was happier than I had ever been, so I did not mind if we did not have full relationship. Besides, I gave up any idea of being married years ago, when I nearly die from cancer. When I survive, I vow to work as specialist nurse to help others facing such terrible times. Neil and I, we kiss many times but I feel much frustration he and I did not get closer. Reverend Prudence from our church offered for me to go and live with her family – she say something about whatshe call idle gossip which I did not understand so I looked it up and see it mean conversations about other people’s private lives – and I suggest to Neil perhaps moving would be a good idea.
But then, out of the blue, he proposed me.
It was such a happy shock; truly a dream come true. I thank God –Paldies Dievamwe say in Latvia – he fall in love with me.
I look at the children sitting around the table. They close their eyes and put their hands together. We all say a simple prayer, ‘Thank you for our daily bread.Paldies Dievam.’
Neil serves the stew and I hand the bowls to each child, happy to see their hungry smiling faces.
‘Guy-da?’
It sends a thrill to my heart whenever Grace address me so. I did not think I would ever be a mama, not after my womb was removed. But here I am with three beautiful stepchildren.
‘What’s this called? I can’t remember.’ Grace takes a large mouthful and then helps Lizzy to load her spoon.
‘Sipolu Sipenis,’ I tell her. ‘Is Latvian stew. My mama used to make it for me when I was little girl.’
‘Where’s your mama now?’
‘She is in heaven like your mama. Perhaps they are friends there?’
Theo pulls a face. ‘What are these funny lumps?’
‘Onions.’
Theo pushes the onions on one side with his spoon before he eats the rest and I sit back and watch. Now andthen I help Grace to feed Lizzy who, I am sure, will one day make decision to feed herself. She is still just baby at only three years old. In Latvia, I grew up too quickly. Here it is good to be children for as long as possible.
‘Why aren’t you eating, Guy-da?’
‘I have dance tonight, Theo. I will eat when I get home. Is not good idea to dance with full stomach.’
‘It can’t be long until the competition.’ Neil reaches for a second piece of my homemade black bread. ‘Less than two weeks, yes? I’m just sorry we can’t come and watch you dance.’
‘Why can’t we?’
‘It’s in Paris,’ Grace tells Theo. ‘Paris is in France.’
‘Why can’t we go to France?’
Neil look with kind eyes at his son. ‘Paris is just a bit too far and anyway Nanna and Gramps are coming to stay that weekend.’
Theo groans loudly and Neil gives me a look full of meaning.
I nod. I fix a smile onto my face, but inside I am making a frown. While I am gone, Neil will tell Maya’s parents we are married.
‘We need to keep this to ourselves for now,’ he say to me after our short registry office service. ‘We can’t even tell the children yet, not until I have told Rita and Terry.’
‘They will not be happy?’
‘It’s hard for them, Ingrida. They still haven’t come to terms with what happened to Maya.’
