Page 127 of Dancing Fools and All That Jazz
It is very hard to concentrate on Fay’s words as I help her to get ready for bed. My conversation with Neil, it goes around inside my head, and I cannot make sense of it. He finally called when we were in the dressing room watching the finals show and I took my phone to the ladies to speak with him in private.
‘Sorry I didn’t call earlier. I’ve only just got the kids to bed. Lizzy’s been playing up rotten without you here. I had to put her down in our bed in the end. How’s the dancing?’
I could not bring myself to answer.
‘Ingrida? You OK?’
‘I speak with Grace yesterday.’
‘Really?’
‘She tell me Rita and Terry now know big secret.’
‘Ah.’
‘You did not tell them we are married. They find out from children.’
‘Ingrida, it’s been hard…’
‘Hard for you? To say we are now husband and wife?’
‘No. Hard for them. They left. Walked out as soon as they found out. Look, they’ll come round. They don’t understand… they don’t know you…’
‘Ne, they do not know me. I am not in house to speak with them so they will not know me…’
‘Ingrida, in the whole scheme of things, this is of little importance.’
‘Little importance. I do not know what you mean.’
‘It’s just… well, there’s a lot of other stuff going on. Look, I will tell you when you get back. Things are… complicated and well, today someone arrived at the house and… well, basically made a lot of threats.’
My heart, it knot and I think of Kazimieras and I was unable to find the words to tell Neil.
‘Ingrida, I can’t talk about this on the phone.’
‘Who… who make these threats?’
‘Look, I didn’t want to worry you but I need to come clean… There are… well, some things I haven’t told you… I haven’t been completely honest…’
He go very quiet and I wait until he speak again.
‘When you get back… I’ll tell you everything. Oh no. Lizzy’s crying again. I need to go. See you tomorrow.’
‘Neil?’
But he hang up without even saying I love you and I am left in confusion with his words.
The rest of the evening, it went by in a blur. At the theatre I was with the other dancers on stage, but inside my head I was thinking of Neil’s words and no matter how much I say to God to take this worry away, my mind would not settle.
Now we are in the hotel room and the others eat a pizza they have delivered to the room.
‘Ingrida, you sure you don’t want any?’ Bonnie askme. ‘It’s actually quite good and you can heat it up in the microwave.’
‘Ne, thank you. I am not hungry. I think I will go to bed and read.’
‘Good idea, Ingrida.’ Fay puts the crust of her pizza in an empty box and wheels herself to her bed where I help her to get in.
‘I haven’t even got the energy to brush my teeth.’ Fay gives a big sigh when I lift her bad leg onto the bed. ‘Oh, what a relief to finally put my foot up.’
