Page 38 of Raphael
CHAPTER24
Raphael
I lean backin the doctor’s lounge, staring blankly out the dark windows, exhausted only twelve hours in, and yet knowing that sleep won’t find me anytime soon. The chaos of my ER shift still thrums through my veins, preventing any chance of relaxation. With a grimace, I toss back the dregs of bitter coffee, long grown cold. Should I grab another before the next wave hits?
Glancing over patient charts stacked haphazardly across the table conjures echoes of cries still ringing in my ears—the choking infant girl pulled bewildered from her crib after older siblings awakened their parents to terrifying blue lips... The adolescent boy wheeled in unconscious after accidentally overdosing while unsupervised at a party... The toddler with a dangerously high fever, brought in trembling and confused.
Endless cases blur together in these fluorescent halls as I work tirelessly to patch up the fragility of human bodies. The bone-deep weariness never fades, no matter how much I sleep. But there’s also a raw awe that fills me when I witness just how much suffering living creatures can endure before reaching their limits. My divine healing gifts allow me to transform pain into wholeness, yet they fail to erase the helplessness that lingers behind their frightened eyes.
I exhale heavily, dragging my thoughts back from the dark depths of human despair. Michael smiles over the rim of his coffee mug, lounging in the couch across from my cluttered table. Papers and empty takeout containers litter around us, remnants of our working lunch.
In moments like these, I’m grateful for the unbreakable bond between my siblings. Michael’s calm energy balances out my frenetic restlessness, providing a fleeting sense of peace after facing the most grueling hours.
“Let me guess—Jones and Kapoor?” I ask, glancing up from the patient chart I’m reviewing.
Michael laughs, scrubbing a hand down his face. “Is it that obvious?”
I snort, capping my pen. “Please. You’ve been mentor-despairing over those two babyfirefighterssince training camp started.” Firefighters. That’s what we call Guardian rookies. “What dazzling heroic antics have they embarked on now?”
Rolling his eyes good-naturedly, Michael drapes his tall frame into the chair beside me. We’re finally alone in the doctor’s lounge, catching a rare break together between brutal ER shifts tonight.
“Oh... the usual,” he sighs. “Rushing into dangerous situations without proper gear, disobeying direct orders in the name ofglory, trying to squat way more weight than their scrawny forms can handle...”
I chuckle at his exasperated tone. “Ah, the impulsiveness of youth. We were hardly better back in the day, o valiant commander.”
“Speak for yourself.” Michael tries and fails to look stern, the corner of his mouth quirking. “Some of us actuallyrespectedthe chain of command.”
“As I recall, a certain maverick battlefront angel earned quite the reputation for daring solo strikes, breaking ranks...” I wink playfully. “... Sir.”
Michael cracks a grin, cuffing the back of my head. “Brat. Maybe there’s hope for my reckless charges yet, if you eventually turned out so well.”
His praise warms me, as always. We clasp wrists briefly—bonds of brotherhood forged through our shared scars. I know Michael’s gentle heart hides weariness few glimpse under the stoic commander mantle. But for now, contentment graces his eyes and eases my own burdens.
Leaning forward, I top off his mug, clapping one shoulder lightly. “Your time and care never go unnoticed, brother.” My smile includes the countless devoted Guardians who still seek Michael’s golden wisdom and leadership by example. “They would charge through fire without question at your word.” I nod, knowing he’s the one who gives them hope and a vision for making a difference.Heis their inspiration.
Michael accepts my praise graciously, eyes crinkling warmly. “And here I thought you were going to tease me for becoming a mother hen again,” he says.
I laugh, slumping back in the well-worn chair. “Oh, never that! Who better to nurture all in need?” Michael’s rolled eyes spark another chuckle. “You’re still the best of us, bro. But let’s keep that between us—I have a playboy image to uphold.”
Michael scoffs into his mug, shaking his head. Then those astute azure eyes narrow, searching my grin subtly. “Speaking of your, shall we say,infamousreputation...” He studies me closely. “No recent escapades to share then?”
My pulse skips reflexively. So much is happening behind discreet doors lately, it hardly seems real. The dual life I lead of endless trauma shifts here versus passionate nights stolen outside feels like a fantasy. But those secret hours shelter me from the bitterness and burnout that threatens all physicians.
Michael waits patiently through my distraction, nursing his coffee without pressuring for a response. And abruptly, the need to share my happiness tumbles free before second thoughts silence the impulse. If anyone deserves insight on my deliriously blissful state, Michael has earned it a thousand times over. Perhaps confiding in someone I trust can ease the guilt weighing on me for betraying heaven’s sacred laws.
My decision is made. I fold my hands loosely, trying to hide any nervous tells that might give me away under Michael’s perceptive eye. I know he won’t judge me; if anyone can understand love defying tradition, it’s him.
“Well, actually... there has been someone recently.” Candor edges my quiet admission. Michael tilts his head attentively, but lets me dictate the pace uninterrupted. I wet my dry lips, pulse thrumming loudly. “We connected some time ago—she stood out instantly from the usual. There’s this magnetic chemistry between us I can’t resist.”
The fondest memories surface: her warm brown eyes closing in delight, riotous chestnut curls tumbling freely down her back... I can almost see that brilliant smile lighting up the room, hear husky laughter meant only for me. Already, craving spikes through my blood, restless to finish this shift and find her delicious heat again.
“Things started casually, but it’s grown deeper than either of us intended, I think.” I lift a shoulder self-consciously under Michael’s weighted look. There’s no hiding the burning truth from my brother, who’s most attuned to emotions. I push on before I lose my nerve. “We’ve seen each other frequently since. And Michael... I cannot get enough of her when we’re together. The days feel empty and lonely until she’s in my arms again.”
Raw longing bleeds through despite my pressed lips. Silence swells, my reflections dancing across the coffee, dark enough to match her stunning eyes. My whole body hums tautly, awaiting Michael’s reaction. But my brother only watches me steadily for a while. Then something in his gaze shifts. Michael sets his mug down with care and leans nearer, tentative joy dawning.
“Raphael... you believe you’re falling in love with this woman?” He breathes the question delicately, as if volume could shatter our bubble.
My throat clenches, denying air. Hearing the terrifying possibility spoken aloud makes my yearning swell almost past containing. Michael’s gentle smile and understanding hand on my wrist coaxes horrified excitement up my tight chest until the words tear free in an anguished rush.
