Page 42 of Embers of Fate
But it’s not the party that weighs on my mind, not the thought of facing the Deverauxs and their insufferable superiority. No, it’s the silence from Nik that cuts me to the core, the lack of any word or sign that he’s thinking of me, missing me the way I miss him.
Was it really that easy for him to move on, to forget what we had? How can he pretend that our love was anything less than extraordinary, a once-in-a-lifetime kind of connection?
Gods, I don’t think he’s having a hard time being apart. Not like I am, not like I’m drowning in the pain of his absence, suffocating under the weight of my own broken heart.
The creak of my bedroom door jolts me from my thoughts, and I hear a familiar voice call out, “Sam?”
I don’t look back, don’t want to see the pity in my friend’s eyes. “Mila,” I say, my tone dull and lifeless.
I’ve been keeping my distance from her ever since I got back from Brittany, ever since my world imploded in a fiery blaze of heartache and betrayal. She knows the reason, knows the role she played in tearing me away from Nik.
“Can I come in?” she asks, her voice tentative, unsure.
I want to tell her no, to scream at her to leave me alone with my misery. But I purse my lips instead, swallowing back the bitter words that rise in my throat.
“Sam...” she continues, and out of the corner of my eye, I see her ambling towards me, something green clutched in her hands. “I’m sorry about what happened...”
My head snaps towards her, and I fix her with a menacing glare, the anger that’s been simmering inside me finally boiling over. “Was it you?” I demand, my voice sharp and accusing. “Just admit it.”
I’m so certain she’s the one to blame, the one who ratted me out to Gavriil. It could be no one else. Only she knew where I was staying. Only she had the power to betray my trust so completely.
“No, of course not!” Mila pleads, her blonde curls bouncing as she kneels by my side, her eyes wide and desperate. “How can you think that of me?”
“Well, for starters, your brother was there,” I mumble, my tone aloof and distant. “I sawhimfirst.”
“Sam, please believe me! It wasn’t me!” Mila grabs my arm, her fingers digging into my skin. “My sister, she was so worried that covering for you would get us into trouble with Gavriil. She must have called Dima...”
A frown furrows my brow, confusion warring with the anger that still simmers in my veins.
“I didn’t know a thing about Gavriil coming over to find you,” Mila continues, her words tumbling out in a rush. “I swear! Dima told me about it only after you returned to Paris!”
Her pink lips quiver, tears rimming her eyes, and I feel a flicker of doubt, a tiny spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, I’ve been wrong about her all along.
“Please, Sam,” she begs, her voice breaking. “Tell me you believe me!”
My expression softens, the anger draining away as quickly as it came. I take Mila’s hands in mine, the holiday wreath she was carrying falling forgotten to the floor.
“Oh Mila,” I whisper, my throat tight with unshed tears. “It was awful... It’s all a mess!”
I leap down from the window, falling into her arms, and she holds me tight, her embrace warm and comforting. And just like that, the floodgates open, and I’m weeping like I did when I left Nik, my body shaking with the force of my sobs.
“I love him, Mila,” I choke out, biting my lip to hold back the wail that threatens to escape. “And I’ve lost him forever!”
Tears spill down my cheeks, hot and bitter, a physical manifestation of the grief that consumes me.
“I’m so sorry, sweetie,” Mila murmurs, her voice soft and soothing. She pulls back, locking eyes with me, a tiny smile playing at the corners of her mouth. “Hey. Maybe you’ll run into him tonight?”
Her words spark a flicker of interest, a tiny ember of hope that refuses to be extinguished. “Tonight?” I ask, narrowing my eyes in confusion. What the devil is she talking about?
“At Deveraux Manor,” she explains, as if it should be obvious. But I’m still in the dark, my mind too clouded by heartache to make the connection.
“Huh?” I wrinkle my nose, wondering if Mila has finally lost her mind.
“At the Yule party?” she prompts, giving me a knowing look.
And just like that, it clicks. My eyes widen, my stomach dropping like a stone. “That’s tonight?” I gasp, my heart racing in my chest.Oh my fucking gods.
“Yeah...” Mila shrugs, as if it’s no big deal. But to me, it’s everything.
