Page 41 of Nashville Cowboy
I used to feel sorry for myself, but I do have a lot to be grateful for. For a long while, I never thought I’d smile again. Life got so ugly and dark that some days I just wanted to die. Then I came back to Stone Ridge and Mima said I could ride Thimble whenever I wanted to as long as I’d help with the groom’s job. The first time she smiled at me I thought I was seein’ things. Horses don’t smile, some say, but I know they do. She’s one of my best friends even if she can’t talk back to me.
And I know it’s going to hurt when Jackson leaves, but if I can survive what I did, I can survive anything.
They dismounted at the same time and led their horses back to the stable. Jackson took Thimble’s reins. “Let me.”
“You’re going to unsaddle and brush ’em both?”
“Yeah, I am. I guess you’re needed inside.”
That was true and she appreciated the help. The groom wouldn’t be around today. “Don’t forget to clean their shoes.”
He cocked his head and slid her his dimpled grin. “Eve, I know what to do.”
“Of course you do.” She stepped away, but then stopped and turned. “Jackson?”
On her mind were many things she wanted to say to him. She wanted him to kiss her again because just being held in his powerful arms wasn’t enough anymore.
Please be patient with me. When I tell you everything, and I will, I need you to understand. I don’t want you to dissolve into anger and revenge. I’ve done that myself, and it doesn’t help a thing. I know.
“Eve?” Jackson was studying her, his blue eyes intent, brow furrowed. “What is it?”
“Um, thank you for the help.”
He nodded, his eyes smiling teasingly. “You work too hard.”
She laughed and shook her head, removing her gloves as she walked away. “No, I don’t.”
By the time Eve reached the kitchen, Mima was already up.
“Mornin’.”
“Already been out for a ride?”
“Every morning before sunrise.”
Eve cooked up the usual breakfast burritos for the hands, then packed them up for the short drive up the hill. “I’ll head out and drop these off then be back for your breakfast.”
“Am I working you too hard, sugar?” Mima asked.
“Funny, Jackson just told me I work too hard.” She waved the thought away with one hand while the other carried the box of food. “Y’all stop worrying.”
Keeping busy helped to push dark or negative thoughts away. Between the ranch and her work, the dark thoughts only chased her at night when it was time to sleep. Only then did she remember that the world wasn’t always a safe place, that sometimes when you least suspected it, you could be flattened by life. That moment could come along at any time, without notice, unless you were always on alert.
But for several days she didn’t have a single dark thought or memory to push away. She thought it might be because of Jackson. He’d brought a certain kind of sweetness back into her small world. Some part of her would always love him, but she could accept what they had now. There was no need to hurry a thing.
If, with time, something more developed, she’d be open to it. She just needed more time to be ready to feel close to someone again.
As she drove her truck past the stables, she waved to Jackson, who was just making his way back to the house. She drove the quarter mile up the hill. The cowboys were ready for her when she arrived, barely waiting for the truck to come to a full stop. She handed out breakfast to grateful men, then caught sight of her mother nearby.
“Mom?” Eve asked in surprise. “What areyoudoing here?”
Brenda did something that Eve never saw her do before. She blushed. “Hey there. I just came by to see you.”
As far as Eve knew, this was the first time her mother ever lied to her. “So early? The sun just came up.”
“Did you forger I’m an early riser, too?” Brenda came close, tugging gently on Eve’s braid. “Your hair looks so pretty.”
“In a braid?” Eve blinked. “Um, okay. Thanks?”
