Page 56 of The Ex Next Door
Mom reached inside the cupboard for the cocoa mix and took the milk out of the refrigerator. Okay, wow, what was with the constant memory dump these days? She remembered this drill, but now she was twice the age she’d beenthe first time it happened. Her mother wanted to talk and thought a cup of hot cocoa would loosen Amy’s lips. It didn’t matter whether it was the peak of a summer heat wave or winter, cocoa hit the spot when it came to talks with her mother. Always had.
“Thanks for your concern but I know what I’m doing.”
“Do you? You’ve just been divorced from the father of your children. It’s hardly time to reconnect with old boyfriends.” Mom grabbed a saucepan and spooned cocoa into the milk.
Amy took a seat at the kitchen table. “Listen. It’s time you realize this divorce happened. You act like one day we’re all going to wake up and the whole thing will have been a nightmare. Positive thinking is one thing, but I have to recognize and deal with reality. Rob is seeing someone and he’s introducing her to the kids this weekend. The truth is, even if Rob wanted me back now, I wouldn’t want to.”
She glanced up from stirring. “What are you saying? You always have to give him a second chance. He’s the father of your children.”
“And he’s always going to be. We will always be in each other’s lives. But I don’t love him anymore. I… I want to be with Declan.”
It was the truth and saying it out loud now only confirmed what she already knew. A part of her was falling back in love with him. The rushed and heady sensations every time she saw him…the ways she thought of him every day…the way she kissed him… It was all adding up to love.
“Really? So soon?”
“I want to see where it goes. We were young the first time we were together, but maybe now… Mom, there wasalwayssomething there with him. Something real. And nothing has changed.”
“Maybe not, but everything else about the rest of your world has changed. Is Declan really going to settle down and be a stepfather to the children? Is he going to be there, day in and day out, supporting you emotionally?”
“I have a lot of faith in him.”
“That’s not an answer. Is that faith well placed?”
“Why would youaskthat?”
“I don’t want you to get hurt again. The end of a relationship is so emotional and especially for you. You’ve endured so much loss. First, you lose Declan when you’d pictured a future with him, right or wrong. Then, your father dies unexpectedly. And lastly, Rob decides he doesn’t want to be married anymore. That’s a lot of loss in the past decade.”
“It is, but if there’s one thing my dad taught me, it was to believe in people. And he loved Declan even after we split.” Amy sighed. “It seems I’m going to have to take a chance with my heart no matter who I date or fall for. Don’t worry. If it helps, I’m scared, too.”
“No, you’re not.” Moonbeam set a mug in front of Amy and squeezed her hand. “You’re like your father. Always so brave and willing to trust in the goodness of people. I’m the child of hippies but even I can’t bring myself to trust people they way you two did.”
“That’s because your hippie parents trusted everyone a littletoomuch,” Amy said. “Did you know Declan quit working at the high school because of a gun incident?”
“Yes. A couple of years ago.”
“No one told me.”
“Declan wasn’t even mentioned when it came on the evening news. Only the perpetrator’s name. I just happened to hear how Declan was involved later from Lorna when I ran into her at the grocery.”
Amy didn’t have to ask why Mom never brought it up to her. There would have been no reason to. Declan was fine, and he wasn’t even on her radar then.
“It happened because he did the right thing. He refused to give a passing grade to a kid just so he could win the school some football games.”
Mom nodded. “You’ll have no argument from me that Dan and Lorna raised those boys right.”
“Then I wish you’d give him a chance. It would mean a lot to me.”
“I will, but please be careful and take it slow.”
She planned to. No need to rush when they lived next door to each other, and Amy would have time to introduce the idea to her kids. She’d go easy, let them first realize how much they liked Declan. Naomi would be the easier one of the twins. David should follow easily considering how much Declan had helped him. Once both of them genuinely liked Declan, things should go smoother. She’d explain that she and Declan used to be the best of friends when they were younger and then gradually fell in love. There’s no way this could go badly, and as luck would have it, Rob was doing the trial-by-fire version this weekend. She’d take notes and learn to do it better when it was her and Declan’s turn. In the meantime, she’d read everything she could get her hands on about blended families. Michelle would have some resources.
After checking on Naomi and David, Amy headed to bed. When she’d moved, she remembered packing her old yearbooks, wondering what a person was supposed to do with them. Recycle? She didn’t want them in a landfill somewhere, so she packed and moved them with barely a glance. The books would come in handy now. She reached into the shelf of her closet where she’d stored them and cracked open her senior yearbook. Skimming the pages, she came to thevarsity baseball team. There was young Declan, clearly the star, on the pitcher’s mound, with the group, his golden looks almost eclipsing his stats. On the “most likely to” page she found the two of them, holding hands, smiling into the camera, looking innocent enough to be approximately twelve years old. She, for her part, had the faith of a child when it came to Declan.
“Most Likely to Get Married” the caption said.
Welp, that hadn’t happened. But, safe to say, most high school plans had not materialized either, such as their school’s beautiful theater geek, Raquel Martinez, captioned “Most Likely to Win an Academy Award.” Raquel had opened a hair salon in town, but she was about as far from Hollywood as she could get. Declan was also captioned as “Most Likely to Win the World Series.” Also hadn’t happened. And there was no way Harry Delinski was ever going to be president, though he managed an insurance office in San Antonio, last she’d heard.
This had simply been her first dream, and it hadn’t been as lofty as the others. Amy was a bit embarrassed that she hadn’t reached higher. Or maybe her dreams were simply smaller than other people’s. But even then, she’d clearly only seen herself as half of a couple. That was going to change.
