Page 72 of The Ex Next Door
“Here you go.” She set the sandwich down.
“Thanks.” David barely looked at her, not even noticing the triangles as he used one hand to take a bite.
“What did we say about eating and electronics?”
“They don’t go together.” David paused his game and took two huge bites of his sandwich.
Amy sat in the chair across from him, wondering how best to put the truth to him. She had to be at once firm but also compassionate. Her little boy wanted something she was never going to be able to give him, and to say that stung was an understatement.
“David, look at me.”
“Yeah?” He did, his beautiful eyes so filled with hope it nearly killed her.
“Daddy and I are not going to get back together.” Her voice cracked and she cleared her throat.
“You never know!”
“I do know, honey.” Meeting his gaze, she refused to look away from those hazel eyes so like her own.
“Why won’t you give him a chance?” David whispered and he sounded so grown-up she had to blink for a moment.
“Honey, it’s not that simple.” She reached for his hand, but he pulled it away.
“Yes, it is!”
“Remember we said some things are too complicated for kids to understand? This is one of them.”
“Why? You alwayssayI’m super smart.”
Amy struggled for an analogy that might make sense to a nine-year-old boy’s emotional maturity.
“Well, remember when soccer just didn’t work out for you, even though I made you stick with it? Even though I didn’t want you to quit? You tried, I know you did, but it just wasn’t a good fit. It wasn’t fun. Then you found baseball and you could see what you were missing. You’re good at baseball and you have fun, too. Right?”
No, this wasn’t right, either.Terribleanalogy. She was sinking fast and could only think that Declan would knowwhat to say. He was so good at positive self-talk, so good at being someone’s personal cheerleader.
All of these intense feelings David had expressed were real and complicated and there was no place for more platitudes here. Only real talk, age-appropriate.
“Never mind. That might be a bad example.” She gave up and tried again. “What I mean is—”
“It’s because of Daddy! All this is his fault, and Ihatehim!”
David stood up from his chair so fast that it made a scraping sound across the tile floor.
“David, honey, wait,” she said but he left the kitchen, taking his tablet with him.
In a fantasy world where Amy reigned as queen and everyone else were her subjects, of course it would be wonderful to be the favored parent. The great unblamed. The favored.
Let the kids take their anger of the divorce out on the father they once adored. Realistically, it was his fault anyway.
In the real world in which she lived and functioned, this hatred was going to cause more division and anger that wouldn’t serve anyone. If left to grow, it would infect her children like a parasite. David hated the world right now, because he was almost a year behind Amy and Rob in terms of acceptance. He’d only now come to the full-blown realization that his perfect and previously protected bubble had popped and forever shifted.
And all he wanted to do was get his world back in order again.
She was David’s mother, and so she felt his suffering like a blade knifing through her heart, looking for the best place to cut the deepest. Amy blinked back tears.
“Mommy!What about my cookies and milk?” Naomi called out from the living room.
Right. Amy rose, poured milk and plated some cookies. This was something she could do. Feed her children. Read them a bedtime story. Sit and cuddle. Love them.
