Page 114 of A Curse of Hope and Shadows: Part I
He wanted to call for her, but he would not be a child. He would conquer this. He would.
A few more days passed in this fashion, until the day of the full moon. Dimitri’s dread increased with his cousin’s presence, worsened by Adeline’s continued absence. A pounding headache had plagued him all morning.
“Are you all right?” Alexei asked, as his eyes glazed over at lunch.
“Headache,” he said, lacking all energy to lie.
“I’ll ring for someone.”
Alexei stood up to ring the bell, muttering something to the servant who arrived. Algernon appeared a moment later, calling Alexei away for a matter of business and leaving Dimitri alone in the room. He shut his eyes and tried to count backwards; as good a distraction as any.
The door opened softly, but he gave it no heed, gave nothing any thought at all until a hand slid across his.
“Dimitri…”
He opened his good eye, and smiled. “Adeline.”
She raised her remaining hand to his forehead. “They said you weren’t well?”
“Just a headache,” he assured her, hoping she wouldn’t take back her hand. She didn’t, running her fingers through his hair instead. “If I’d known this was what it took to get you back beside me, I’d have feigned illness long ago.”
“I… I’m not ignoring you. Not precisely.”
“I’m not ignoring you, either.”
“Then what are we doing, then?” There was a tremble in her voice, unlike anything he’d heard from her before.
“I’m trying to distract myself, mainly,” he said. “You?”
“Something similar, I’d imagine.”
He wasn’t sure if he loved or hated that, if she was giving him a confession or ignoring one.
“Adeline,” he said, echoing her words, “I’m sorry we can’t, but I’m not sorry we did.”
She nodded, jaw tight. “I know,” she said.
He twisted round his hand and slipped his fingers into hers. “Then friends?”
“Always,” she said, and leaned forward to press a kiss on his brow.
The door opened, and in walked Clarin with a tray of remedies. Adeline leapt up, but he grabbed her wrist before she could vanish.
“Will you come with me tonight?”
She stilled. “You know I will.”
It was almost enough to make him look forward to the transformation.
Almost.
Nothing Alexei attempted could dispel the gathering pit of nerves and dread coiling inside his stomach, but finding Adeline waiting for him in the cellars at least loosened the knots. She half looked like she wanted to bolt into his arms, and he was only faintly disappointed when she didn’t. He wasn’t sure he’d have the strength to stay upright if she did.
Thomas offered him a tonic, followed by a stiff drink.
“Does the tonic help at all?” Adeline asked gingerly.
Dimitri shrugged. “The whiskey works better.”
