Page 90 of A Curse of Hope and Shadows: Part I
“Oh, not like you at all.”
Adeline glared.
“My mother didn’t have a practical bone in her body,” Dimitri told her. “But she was kind. She used to read to me, too.”
“I think I would have liked her.”
“She would certainly have liked you.” Dimitri’s forehead scrunched together, and he let out a low groan. He leant his head against Adeline’s shoulder.
“Dimitri?”
“Headache,” he said, his breathing a little unsteady, “just let me stay here for a minute. It might pass.”
“I thought they’d got better of late.”
“They’re still there,” he assured her, “I just don’t tend to notice them as much with you around.”
Adeline rubbed his back, palm flat against his spine. She could no longer feel his ribs through the back of his shirt. He felt more solid than she remembered. “Is it passing?”
“Sadly not.”
“Lie here, or upstairs?”
“Upstairs, please,” he said, with his eyes shut tight. Adeline slid her hand around his back and pulled him to his feet, tugging one of his arms over her shoulder. He was heavier than before, more of a weight against her. He reallywasdoing better, so much so that she quite frequently forgot there was anything wrong with him at all.
Until moments like this, when it was so startlingly clear.
He kept his eyes closed as she escorted him back to his room, trusting her to guide him, saying nothing as she lay him back against the pillows and fetched him a compress.
“Quiet or company?” she asked.
“Is the company yours?”
“You know it is.”
“Then you,” he said, “always you.”
Adeline sat beside him on the bed, no longer finding it a strange place to be. She slid onto it as easily as her bed at home, hers, however infrequently she used it. She ran her fingers through his hair and wished for a power to suck pain away.
“Adie?”
“Yes?”
“You can’t fix everyone.”
She swallowed. “Am I allowed to want to?”
“I’m worried it hurts you to want to.”
“It does,” she said. “But sometimes people are worth the hurt.” She watched him for a moment, eyes spasming between half-moon lids. “You’reworth the hurt.”
Dimitri’s fingers found hers and laced them into his. “I’d fix your hurt, too, if I could. I’d carry all of it for you… all...” His words mushed together, blurred by pain.
“You don't need to speak.”
“I… I need you to know…”
“I know,” she said, “and I understand.”
