Page 31 of The Devil and the Heiress
Some would be repelled, but the worst ones would want her anyway because of her money. He wanted to tell her that marriage would solve her suitor problem, but it was still too soon. Instead, he said, “Then write to me, Miss Crenshaw, and I will write you back.”
She smiled broadly, thrilled with his answer. Turning her attention back to her meal, she said, “Will you tell me more about Blythkirk?”
He stared at her fingers as she played with her bread, his brain still swimming in the arousal of the previous moment. He had never noticed before, but ink seemed to permanently stain the tips of the fingers that held her pen. “There isn’t much to tell. It’s a small estate compared to Amberley Park. It belonged to my mother’s brother. When he died without issue, it was left to me. It was where I would go between terms at school.”
“You wouldn’t return to Amberley Park?”
“My father abhorred my presence there and I his. Blythkirk became a refuge.”
She was silent, watching him with those all-knowing eyes that saw too much. He didn’t know why he had revealed so much to her. His father was dead and buried. There was no need to discuss the bloody bastard.
“Your mother is still living? Where is she?”
“My father banished her to the Continent years ago, after she had taken one lover too many.” Christian could still remember the terrible row they had had that night when his father had returned home to Amberley Park early. His mother had been packed off the next day, sporting a swollen jaw and red-rimmed eyes. Christian had never known the man she was cavorting with, except that he had been acommoner from one of the nearby villages. “She has never seemed inclined to return for very long, even though he’s been dead for over fifteen years.”
“I’m sorry. How old were you when she left?”
He shrugged. “I do not remember precisely. Five, perhaps.”
She made a soft sound in the back of her throat and put her hand on his arm. The look she gave him was kind and filled with concern, without a hint of censure or mocking. “How often have you seen her since?”
“She has returned a handful of times for momentous occasions only to sweep out again to return to her life.”
“Do you regard her harshly?”
He shook his head. “Not anymore.” He had for a time. After all, hadn’t he grown up under the wrath of his father’s ire? Hadn’t he managed fine, even while knowing that the man despised the sight of him and questioned his paternity? Couldn’t she? But that had changed when the man’s wrath had manifested in more physical consequences. Once Christian understood what it meant to have the entirety of that man’s hatred centered on him in a physical way, he had forgiven her immediately. “My father was not an easy man. I think she was happier away from him. By the time he died, she had a life on the Continent, and there was no reason for her to resume her life here. Besides, Society would not have allowed her to return without bearing the brunt of their disapproval for some time.”
“You miss her, don’t you?”
He shrugged. “It is difficult to miss someone you barely remember being in your life. I suppose I did miss her early on.” He remembered the feel of her arms around him and her soft bosom beneath his cheek as he cried about some childhood trauma, but as he had grown older, those memories had faded. He had never had a mother to deal with his adolescent concerns, so not having one had not bothered him.
“After my father’s death, I learned about my half brother, Jacob, his mother, and his sisters. My father had arrangedit so that while I inherited the properties and debts, they inherited the funds, along with their home in Bloomsbury. One day I went and confronted them. I was still a child in many ways.” He remembered that day still. The surprised look on Thea’s face, the way she had calmly shown him the door when he had said unspeakably rude things to her.
“What happened?” Violet asked, leaning forward.
“Dorothea... Thea, Jacob’s mother, my father’s longtime mistress, rightfully had me thrown out. I accused her of terrible things. I allowed my anger with my father to lead me, and thankfully, she understood that. I soon returned, and she allowed me in. Over time I came to know her very well. She helped me grieve and eventually supported my plan to begin the club with Jacob. She became important to me.” He glanced down at his food, swallowing over the tender ache in his throat. “She died several years ago.”
“I’m sorry that she is gone. She must have been a very loving person.”
He nodded, and the words kept tumbling out of him. “Her father was a successful coal merchant outside of London. My father had dealings with the man, which is how he met Thea. She was the youngest of her family, and her leaving reportedly caused a rift between her and her father. He wanted her respectably married. But by her own words she loved my father very much and chose to live with him.” Christian had never understood how the man he had known had been so different from the one of Thea and her children’s experience.
“Do you suppose your father ever wanted to marry her as well?”
“I don’t know. I do know that he despised my mother. Jacob and I are only separated by a few months. I can only assume that he was with them both and chose Thea. My mother didn’t take this lightly. I know that he only married her because she arranged for them to be found together, thereby forcing the marriage. He always believed that I wassomeone else’s bastard. I would have believed it, too, had the physical similarities not been so apparent. By all accounts he was faithful to Thea until his death.”
“You do look very similar to your brother. Aside from your coloring, you could almost be twins.”
“We both take after our father. It was the one thing that shocked Thea when she saw me.”
“I would have very much liked to meet her, but I am glad to not know your father. He treated you poorly.”
Christian could not help but stare at this strange and wonderful woman before him. Thea had been born the daughter of a merchant. Though her relationship with his father had elevated her position somewhat, she would never have been accepted in Mayfair ballrooms. No self-respecting lady would have dared to acknowledge her existence, much less meet her.
“I believe she would have liked you,” he said with all honesty. Thea had liked anyone who was out of the ordinary, who wasn’t afraid to forge their own path.
He took another drink of ale, guilt burning in his stomach. No matter how often he told himself that he was the better choice for her, he could not forget the fact that he was taking her choices away.
“Does it not strike you as odd that the villain of this story, your father by your account, would be the hero in the eyes of Society? His mistress and his wife would both be shunned,” Violet said.
