Page 41 of The Gilded Lady
She was going to miss their whimsy. She knew that this was for the best and that they’d be cared for, she was only sad that she wouldn’t be the one doing it. A large hand ran up and down her back in a slow caress. She looked up to see Zane watching the last buckboard as it disappeared around the corner.
“They’ll be fine,” he said.
“I know.” But she sniffled anyway.
Putting his arm around her shoulder, he drew her against his chest. “I know it’s hard, but you’ll see them again. I promise you that.”
She closed her eyes and allowed herself a moment of comfort. “I sent the telegram to their mother yesterday.” She’d made herself do it, despite the hustle and bustle of making all the other arrangements. She needed to finally tie up this loose end.
“It’s good that you’re getting that settled. You need to move on one way or the other.”
She nodded and looked up at him. This time he looked down at her and his gaze was as deep and intense as she remembered. His thumb caressed her cheek, giving her chill bumps even though the morning was already quite warm. There were so many things unsaid between them, but she didn’t know how to broach them or if he even wanted to. He’d made it clear that he didn’t want any permanence in his life. “I have to go. We’re taking stock of the cellar today. Do you have watch?”
“Afternoon and early evening. We’ll talk tonight about how the men will be stationed. I want to wait for the rest of the men from the ranch to arrive before we finalize things.”
“Would you like to discuss it over supper?” She bit her lip, for some strange reason nerves twisted her belly as she waited for his rejection.
It didn’t come. He hesitated, but then gave a nod. “In your room. I think we need to keep you out of sight as much as possible.”
She didn’t like that. She was a fixture at Victoria House. The last thing she wanted was for people in town to become suspicious. She didn’t want Justin to know that he’d rattled her. But instead of arguing, she nodded. They could talk about it more tonight. “See you then.”
“We have to close Victoria House.” Zane sat across from her at supper that night. He’d been a little late and looked tense as he’d taken his seat. She realized now it was because he’d known that she wouldn’t like what he had to say.
“We are not closing.”
He raised a brow as he picked up his utensils and cut into his mutton. “I knew you’d see it that way.”
She shrugged and gave him a smile. “That’s because you know it doesn’t make good business sense.”
Taking a bite, he chewed it slowly as he studied her. She tried not to analyze too closely why the sight of him eating was so appealing to her and looked back down at her plate. She wasn’t particularly hungry, and hadn’t been since Justin Dubose had come back into her life.
“I suppose it doesn’t, but I’m more concerned about what makes sense for your safety.”
“I can’t let my business fail because I’m worried about my safety.”
“Do you really think the House will fail if you take a few days to lay low?”
She honestly didn’t know what to think. Aside from the occasional ailment that had her taking a nap during the afternoon before the crowds started, she’d never taken any time away from her work. This past week had been the least amount of attention she’d ever given the place. Victoria House was the focus of…well, everything in her life.
“I don’t know. It might.” It was a poor argument, but it was all she had.
When he didn’t answer right away, she looked back up at him to see a smile pulling at the corners of his lips.
“You find that funny?” she asked.
He shook his head and carved off another bite-sized portion of meat, smile firmly in place. “You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself anyway.”
Something about the way he said that ruffled her. “That’s not true. I have my books.” She motioned toward the small corner shelf currently stocked with about a dozen books. She’d already read them, but kept them to pass around to her ladies who liked to pass their time reading. Despite the fact that she’d donated to the local library and had been involved in getting the vote to the ballot to change the library from subscription to free, she didn’t feel comfortable walking into the place. She either sent Charlotte or she ordered her books, which could sometimes take months to arrive.
“And…” Her voice trailed off as she looked around her parlor. Even she had to admit that she didn’t have much to do. Without the twins and the boardinghouse, her business and her advocacy work, she had nothing. “Fine. You’ve made your point.”
He laughed and she kicked him under the table. On one hand, she could see the humor, but on the other hand, it was a keen reminder of what she didn’t have. A fresh ache welled in her chest as she remembered the domestic scene at the Jameson town home from yesterday. She’d probably never have that rich home life with a family. For years she’d been telling herself she was fine with that, but she really wasn’t and she didn’t know if she ever would be.
“Ouch!” He scowled at her and made a show of rubbing his leg.
“Serves you right.” She sniffed and pushed some stewed carrots around on her plate. “You shouldn’t tease me.”
“Maybe I like teasing you.” He said it with that certain timbre in his voice, that soft husk that prickled her skin and made it feel like he was caressing her with his words. His eyes were playful but somehow still held that intensity that she found so alluring with him. It was as if she was the entirety of his focus.
