Page 145 of Our Daughter's Bones
“We did a million things right.” His voice was thick. “I did one thing wrong. I’m sorry. I feel horrible about it. Just tell me what to do. I will do it.”
“I want to know why. Why did this happen?” she asked flatly. “Was there a real reason? Or could you just not keep it in your pants?”
Tears collected in the corners of his eyes. He sniffled and wiped them away. She had never seen her husband cry. In their six years together, he had not shed a single tear. A part of her wanted to comfort him.
But what had he done to them?
“Do you remember our argument from about four months ago? We had it weeks before I left for the conference.”
Mackenzie remembered clearly.
“I was thinking that maybe we should try? To get pregnant?” Sterling suggested nervously.
“I thought you weren’t very keen on kids. We had this conversation before.”
“Yeah, but that was four years ago.”
“I… I don’t know what to say. I don’t want kids. We talked about this.”
“Come on, Mack. Are you saying never?”
“Yes, I am. Why are you ambushing me with this?”
“I can’t even tell my wife what I want now?”
It had been a long night. He accused her of being insensitive. She accused him of being unfair. For days, there was tension between them. His lips were always pursed in disapproval. His words to her were short and dismissive. She had waited for their fight to blow over. He didn’t want kids before, and he had changed his mind. Surely, he could change it again.
But he hadn’t. Instead, he’d looked at her like she had ripped his heart out.
“You cheated on me because I refused to have kids?” She smacked her palm on the granite island. “Are you kidding me?”
“You have no idea how badly I wanted to be a father! I wantedourchildren! When you said no, you destroyed me.”
She paced around the kitchen, vibrating. “I didn’t realize that was a deal-breaker for you. You should’ve just left me.”
“I couldn’t!” he shrieked. He fell on a chair, panting. “I was confused. I was mad at you. I thought you had taken something away from me—the joy of being a parent. I met her at a bar when I was out with my friends. I had a lot to drink. It just… started.”
“You’re such a piece of shit.”
“I made a mistake. I realized I was wrong. It happened so fast. I broke up with her in San Fran. I haven’t seen her since or been in any contact. I swear.”
She didn’t look at him. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t know what to do.
“You won’t even look at me,” he whispered, wounded. “I realized that you were more important to me than anything. I don’t care about children anymore. I saw my life without you in those two weeks, and I didnotwant it. I’m sorry it took me betraying your trust to figure that out.”
“You really punished me for not wanting kids, didn’t you?” A tear raced down her face. He raised a hand to touch her, but she flicked it away. “Please don’t touch me.”
“Mack…”
“You have to go.”
“No!” His lips quivered. “Please don’t end this.”
“I can’t see you for the next few days. I need you out of my face.”
“How long?”
“I’m tired,” she confessed. “I can’t deal with you. Just get out. You can come back tomorrow when I’m at work to pack your bag.”
