Page 21 of Solo Stan
“Dakarai Reginald Barbier.” Pop’s frustration became evident with the crash of silverware meeting the table. “Just do the damn bunny ears.”
“Reggie,” Mama said, admonishing Pop with his own name. “He needs to learn the proper way.”
“Chioma.” Pop’s eyes were daring, but he quickly conceded, letting out an exasperated sigh.
“Maybe I should just stick to slip-ons and slides,” Kai said.
“No,” his parents said, their voices joining in agreement.
“You said you were going to learn, solearn,” Mama said, cutting into her steak like it had done her wrong.
Kai’s leg was starting to cramp, so he placed his foot back on the floor and massaged the tightening muscle in his thigh. Yet,he remained determined; he couldn’t violate his parents’ strictno shoes in the housepolicy just for nothing. He hiked up his other leg, positioning his foot on the chair and leaning his knee against the plastic-covered edge of the dining room table. He made a loop with one side of his lace and then wrapped it around the other side. His parents barely breathed as they looked on. It was time for the moment of truth. He yanked the shoestring tight. Victory was his. Though his finger was once again caught in the knot. His parents let out deep sighs and then turned their attention to their steaks, which were getting cold.
Kai decided to give the bunny ears method a shot. With careful fingers, he formed the first loop, then created the second ear, and then crossed them over each other. As he pulled the loops tight, a sense of accomplishment washed over him.
“Reggie, he did it,” Mama said, smacking Pop with the back of her hand to get his attention. “I don’t care how. It’s about time.”
“Take a picture, Chi,” Pop replied, giving himself a pat-down. “Where the hell is my phone?”
“No time! I’ve got to get to the concert!” Kai exclaimed as he raced toward the door, feeling like a brand-new man.
“You sure you don’t want us to drive you and your friends to Raleigh? Your father and I can walk around downtown until the concert is done,” Mama asked as Kai paused to pat himself down—phone, wallet, keys.
He hadn’t had the heart to tell his parents that his friends weren’t going with him. They would worry too much or probably not let him go at all, and his mind was already made up.
“I’ll be fine, Ma. I’ll be back before the streetlights come on!”
“Very funny!” Pop called right before the door slammed closed.
12
Elias
5:23 p.m.
Alone in his new apartment and feeling restricted by Moodie’s new rules, Elias replayed the day. He hadn’t meant to use Dakarai to get back at Moodie; it just sort of happened that way. And it wasn’t like all of it was disingenuous. Hedidwant to be Dakarai’s friend. Though there was no way they could be friends if they couldn’t break bread together.Could vegans even eat bread?
Elias’s gaze fell on his bag. He’d folded Dakarai’s drawing and shoved it in there, unable to bring himself to look at it after making such a fuss. But he supposed he should. How could he face Dakarai at work the next day if he couldn’t face a piece of paper?
Unzipping his backpack, Elias carefully pulled out Dakarai’s drawing and opened it up. His mouth immediately dropped open. At first glance, it was like a black-and-white photograph. Each line was deliberate and precise, and the cross-hatching created so much depth, particularly in the eyes. Somehow, even in pencil, the drawing seemed to hold warmth and reflect light. The fact that Dakarai was able to see him this clearly made him feel exposed. Dakarai had pretended to be disinterested all day, but something like this couldn’t lie.
Elias groaned and let the drawing flutter to the ground, but he already missed looking at it. Snatching the paper from the floor as quickly as it fell, he turned it in every direction, examining it at every angle. It was perfect, yet Elias couldn’t help but think,Where the fuck are my…?
His eyes slowly widened in realization. The line work and technique were much more defined and had obviously matured, but Elias recognized that art style immediately. He and William had taken Nia to the park near Moodie’s house the last time he was in North Carolina. Elias had been watching his little sister while William was on his phone. When it was time to go home, he had to dispose of any evidence that he had allowed Nia to eat ice cream before dinner. The trash cans were overflowing, and when Elias tried to balance the wrappers on top, a couple of things rolled off the pile, including what looked to be a drawing. He had wondered why anyone would throw away something like that.
Elias had picked up the crumpled paper and unfolded it to find a sketch of himself. He turned in a circle, searching for the artist, but the park was empty. Elias glanced back at the bench where he had been sitting, realizing it was the perfect vantage point for whoever had drawn him.
He had wondered the same thing back then at the park as he did right now in Moodie’s apartment: “Where are my dimples?”
He closed his eyes, and an afterimage of that picture appeared in his mind. Elias had always possessed a photographic memory, so the image was as clear as the day he’d first seen it. When he opened his eyes again, it was as if the past had superimposed itself onto the present, and he became certain that the same hand had drawn both portraits.
The paper was weighty and rough against Elias’s skin. Heabsentmindedly moved it between his fingertips, cursing aloud when he ripped a corner of it. He had never learned to be gentle. His finger slid into the tear, widening it.
Whatever,he thought.I’ve never needed anyone before, and I don’t need anyone now.
Frustration surged through Elias. Before he realized what he was doing, he angrily tore the drawing in half. He crushed it into a ball and threw it into a corner of the barren room.
“Why did I have so much caffeine today?” He felt like he could hear his hair growing. He had energy to burn, yet there was absolutely nothing to do in this quiet little town, and he didn’t know anyone.
