Page 86 of Worth the Wait
He ended the call and dropped the phone to the counter without looking, already reaching for Freddie, grabbing him by the back of the neck to drag him in and devour him. Mouths crashed, messy and hard, and Nathan kissed him as if he wanted to crawl inside him. He did. And he wanted the taste of him to burn away the frustration, the years, the need that still hadn’t ebbed.
Eventually, Nathan pulled back, breath still uneven, and reached for his jeans, tugging them up and fastening the zip. “I gotta go.”
Freddie folded his arms. “You never wanted to end up there.”
“I still don’t.” Nathan tightened his belt, fingers moving quicker than his thoughts. “But what choice do I have? I need a roof over Alfie’s head. I need steady income.” He paused, saw the look Freddie was giving him and needed to at least try to explain why he was putting himself right back where he’d fled from. “Yeah, alright, I’ve got leadership courses, training quals, a service record that says I can manage a platoon and keep twenty lads alive under pressure. But civvy street doesn’t give a shit. Out here, that doesn’t translate. Not straight away. Not whenyou’re a single dad with a kid in trouble and no fallback plan. I’m good with engines. It’s something I can do now. Something that paysnow. And right now, that’s all that matters.”
Freddie studied him. “You could join the force.”
Nathan snorted. “Yeah? You and me? Worthbridge’s answer to Line of Duty?”
Freddie shrugged, a smile playing on his lips. “As you’ve seen, there’s plenty of work, and we could use your experience.”
Nathan looked at him for a long second. Then stepped in again, kissing him softer this time. Languidly. Freddie unfolded his arms and wrapped them around Nathan’s neck, tangling his fingers into his hair.
When Nathan drew back, he pressed their foreheads together. “Get some sleep.”
He moved around the sofa, grabbed his hoodie, and tugged it on. As his head popped through the collar, he saw Freddie watching him. Shoulders tense, uncertainty in his eyes.
Nathan drew in a breath. “I hate asking, but… if there’s any way to keep Alfie’s name out of the logs, I’d be grateful. He’s had a shit hand already. I don’t want this to stain the rest of his life. I’ve got a better grip on him now.”
“I’ll do what I can.”
Nathan gave a small nod, then turned towards the stairs.
“You know how big this thing is?” Freddie called after him.
Nathan turned. Arched an eyebrow.
“The case.” Freddie rolled his eyes, then fell utterly serious. “What Alfie’s involved in…it’s big.”
“How big?”
“Graham Radley big.”
Nathan frowned. “The property mogul? Worthbridge’s golden man?”
“The very same.”
“Fuck.”
“Yeah. No proof. Clean on paper. But we know. CID just gotta prove it.”
Nathan chewed on that. Then nodded. “Thanks for the heads up.” He then turned to leave again.
But Freddie circled around the other side of the sofa, trailing after him. “So… uh. You scratch the itch, then?”
Nathan paused at the top step, turning back. “What?”
“Me. You and me.” Freddie gestured vaguely between them. “Was this… closure? Like, itch scratched, done and dusted? It’s fine if it is. I’m a big boy. I… just want you to be honest. Sorta need to know what this is for you.”
“I’vealwaysbeen honest with you.”
“I know. That’s what hurt most. Sometimes I wished you’d lied. Told me it meant nothing. Cheated. Something easier to hate.”
Nathan stopped mid-step, then turned, climbed back up the single stair he’d taken, and kissed him again. Deep. Firm. With none of the heat from before. Steadier. And when he pulled back, he looked Freddie right in the eye.
“I don’t think my itch for you willeverbe scratched enough.”
