Page 10 of The Cowboy Contract
The room went silent outside of the sound of running water and baby babble. Even then, it took him a couple heartbeats to figure out why.
And if he could have kicked himself, he would have.
The urge to try to explain away what he said—to smooth it over and turn it into some sort of a joke—was strong. It’s what he normally would have done. But between the disappointment of her birthday and being stabbed in the nuts a million times by his niece tonight, he just didn’t have it in him to pretend.
Paige stayed quiet for a minute, brows pinched together as she continued cleaning his nephew. Finally, she peeked his way. “It’s definitely good that didn’t happen. I’m not sure we have enough time to deal with all it would entail before Rosemary starts Rosemary-ing all over the place.”
He wanted to feel relieved. Happy that Paige wasn’t bothered by his comment. Instead he was aggravated.
Pissed at himself for not having the balls to just say everything he wanted to say.
Pissed at her for not bringing their agreement up herself.
Pissed at himself again for making the damn agreement in the first place. For putting a time limit on the thing he wanted most. A sell-by date whose expiration changed everything.
Maybe for the worse.
Because now—even though he didn’t want it to be that way—things were weird between them. Different. And it fucking sucked almost as much as her forgetting what Friday was supposed to mark.
“Turn him so I can get his back.” Paige’s tone was gentle but distracted. Like he wasn’t the only one with spiraling thoughts.
After a few more minutes, she turned off the water and stood up. “I think he’s all cleaned up and poop free.” She went to the linen closet and pulled out a towel. “I’ll go check on Rosemary while you get him reassembled.” She wrapped the fluffy terrycloth around Will and then silently left.
Yeah. Shit was definitely weird between them. And he had no idea how to fix it. No idea if he even could.
Every second he spent with Paige only made it clearer his brain and heart hadn’t gotten the memo that this was it. They wouldn’t be married. Wouldn’t have kids. She wouldn’t be his.
Not the way he wanted her.
With a sigh, he tucked the edges of the towels around Will, standing up to take him to the nursery. After laying the babyonto the changing table, he pulled a fresh diaper from the shelf beneath it and taped it into place.
“I don’t know what in the hell I’m doing, buddy.” Keeping one hand on Will’s belly so he wouldn’t roll away, Leland crouched down to pull out a set of footed pajamas. His nephew watched with big dark eyes as he went to work strapping him into it. “Don’t look at me like that.” Being careful not to pinch any chub, he zipped the front. “There’s nothing I can do.”
Will’s baby face looked skeptical.
“I can’t tell her.” He shook his head to reiterate the statement. “What if she doesn’t want the same thing? Then I’m fucked.” He picked Will up and propped his freshly cleaned nephew on one hip.
The baby continued staring at him.
“Yeah. I know.” Raking one hand through his hair, Leland admitted the full truth. “I might be fucked anyway. Because I don’t know that I can be around her, loving her the way I do.”
5
Paige
“I CAN’T BELIEVE they both fell asleep.” Leland stood in the middle of the kitchen, shoulders slumped as he fought his way through a yawn. “I really thought I was going to be up all night.”
“You still might be.” She didn’t want to burst his bubble, but Will was for sure fighting a gassy tummy that could flare up at any second. She didn’t have much hands-on experience with babies—most of her knowledge came from the internet—and even she knew things could turn on a dime when it came to the little goblins. “There’s no guarantee either of them will sleep long.”
Leland raked one hand through his already messy hair. “Don’t remind me.”
Paige finished collecting the trash left from dinner, piling everything into the bin before wiping down the table. Since he was their beloved uncle, he’d borne the brunt of the kids’ attention, so the least she could do was manage the clean-up.
After rinsing the dishrag and hanging it to dry, she turned to face him. “Why in the world did you agree to watch them overnight?”
“I was tricked.” Leland scrubbed at his eyes. “Bev didn’t mention it until after I’d already agreed.”
She liked Beverly, but that was a total dick move. “When’s your next shift at work?”
