Page 57 of Honey Bee Library
Everything we needed to say was said in that kiss. Our lips. Our tongues. Our bodies. They fell in sync with each other. Everything we’d been holding inside. All the desire we’d been fighting suddenly broke free, and we finally allowed ourselves to feel.
A soft moan escaped my lips, which caused Cole to grip me tighter before he pulled back ever so slightly.
“Dear God, woman,” he growled. “That sound.” His breath warmed my skin before he captured my lips once more.
His tongue teased my lips, and I parted them to let him in. In the past, kissing Harold had been for him. Everything we did had been for him. But with Cole, he knew what he was doing. He knew what a woman wanted and was not selfish in giving it. There was so much I needed to feel when it came to this man, and I was done denying myself.
I broke our kiss, and he glanced down at me with a confused expression. I held his gaze as I pressed against his chest. I was going to take charge. A half smile emerged on his lips as he complied to my demand by collapsing on the seat behind him. But he kept his hands gripped firmly on my waist as he helped lift me slightly so I could straddle him.
Once my knees were firmly planted on either side of him, I lowered myself down onto his lap. We were at eye level now. I felt shy under the intensity of his gaze. It was like I was the only person he could see. The only person that mattered. I lifted my hands up to wrap around his neck, my thumb brushing soft strokes across his jaw line. He tipped his face up toward me, and I captured his lips once more.
Cole’s hands moved from my waist down my hips to my upper thighs, where he pulled me to his chest, his fingertips digging divots into my skin. I responded by rising up slightly on my knees so I could press my body fully against his.
Never in my life had kissing someone felt so…right. With Harold, it was a chore. A wifely duty that I did because it was expected of me. But with Cole, I wanted this. I wanted…everything. He’d taught me what it was to be cared for by a man. Protecting me. Providing for me. Desiring me. Everything my marriage had been missing.
Cole had changed me.
Fear crept into my chest as realization dawned on me. What was I doing? Why was I kissing a man who had every intention of leaving Harmony? Cole’s life wasn’t in Harmony, it was here in Miami, making out with some girl in his hot tub.
I came with baggage. I came with a child.
Cole ran a freaking night club. That was the life of a bachelor, not a stepfather.
If I didn’t stop this, I was going to jump off a cliff and fall for Cole. Except the result of that leap wasn’t our happily ever after as a little family running a diner in a small island town. No, the result of that leap was me watching Cole walk away and then picking up the shattered pieces of mine and Jasper’s hearts.
I’d done that once, and I swore to myself that I would never do that to my son again. I was going to be the mother Jasper needed me to be. I was going to be strong.
I pulled back from the kiss and climbed off Cole’s lap before he could protest. “We should stop.” I backed up until I bumped into the bench behind me, putting sufficient distance between Cole and me.
The last thing I wanted to do was meet his gaze, but I knew if I didn’t, he was never going to believe my words. So I painstakingly brought my gaze up to meet his. Cole looked confused as he studied me and then slowly stood up.
He looked to the left, pushing his hand through his hair like he was trying to focus on the present. “Is that what you want?” he asked, bringing his gaze back to me.
I wanted to yell, “No!” I wanted to explain that I wanted so much more. But I couldn’t. Cole had no one to think about, while I had Jasper. My son was the most important thing to me, and there was no way I was going to let his heart shatter once again.
“I think it’s for the best,” I said in my most confident voice.
Cole studied me for a moment before he nodded. “Okay.”
I didn’t look back after I turned around and climbed out of the hot tub. I kept my gaze forward as I grabbed my towel and hurried into the house. I didn’t stop until I had slipped into the bedroom and closed the door softly behind me.
I tiptoed past Jasper, who was passed out on the bed, and over to the bathroom. Once I was safely in the shower with the hot water beating down on my back, I let my feelings bubble over. I let out a sob as I covered my face, and the tears began to flow.
Deep down, I knew walking away was the right thing. It was the safe thing.
I just wish it didn’t hurt so bad.
18
COLE
I wentto bed confused about what had happened between me and Willow. One minute, we were sharing this mind-blowing kiss, and the next, she was pulling back and basically sprinting away from me. I wanted to think that it didn’t have to do withme, but no matter how much I tried to gaslight myself as I lay in bed the next morning, I feared that I must have done something wrong. And I had no clue how I was going to fix it.
All I knew was that I wanted to see Willow again. I wanted to touch Willow again. I just…wanted Willow. And I hoped that she wanted me.
I was going to go mad, lying in bed, overanalyzing everything that happened last night, so I threw off my comforter and rolled out of bed. I was going to get up, make breakfast, and pray that when I saw Willow next, she would be looking at me the same way she looked at me when she climbed up onto my lap last night.
I showered and dressed in a pair of slacks and a white undershirt. My hair was damp, so I ran the towel over it a few times before checking my reflection in the mirror to make sure I looked okay.
