Page 76 of Honey Bee Library
I gathered the flowers and the ceramic vase with ladybugs dotted all over it before I pushed open the driver’s door and got out. The receptionist smiled at me when I approached the desk. I told her I was there for Georgianna. After showing her my license and getting a visitor sticker, I headed down the hallway that led to Gran’s room.
I used my elbow to press on the door release and quietly entered. The room was silent and dark. I scanned the different areas Gran could be in only to see that she was tucked into her bed, asleep.
At the sight of Gran’s familiar face, all the stress that I’d been holding inside from Willow, my mom, and Harmony began to fade away. Miami was my physical home, but Gran was my emotional home. When I was with her, I felt peace.
She was the anchor that grounded me and gave me safe harbor. I had no idea what I was going to do or who I would be once she passed. It hurt me too much to even think about it.
I quietly filled the vase with water before arranging the daisies as best I could, and then I set the whole thing down on her small dining room table. With the bouquet taken care of, I headed over to Gran. She was still asleep, so I grabbed the nearby armchair and brought it close to the bed.
Once I was sitting, I reached out and took her hand. I wanted her to know that I was here, and I needed the strength that came from being around the woman who loved me unconditionally. Tears pricked my eyes as I held her soft, weathered hand.
I didn’t want to cry. I wanted to be strong for her. But I missed my grandmother. I missed how she always seemed to know exactly what I needed to hear. I missed her chocolate chip cookies and the way she would squeeze me twice before she released me from a hug.
I needed her in my life, and I didn’t know who I was going to be once she was gone.
Exhaustion took over, so I brought my other arm up and rested my forehead in the crook of my elbow. I took in a deep breath as I closed my eyes and let darkness surround me. For the first time in a long time, I was at peace as I felt my body slowly relax.
A feminine voice startled me awake. I blinked a few times as the sight of the floor beneath me slowly came into focus. I frowned as I gathered my bearings. For a split second, I thought I was at the diner, but the smell of Gran’s rose perfume brought me back.
I was in Miami. I was at Seabreeze Memory Lodge visiting Gran. I was alone, and Willow and Jasper were in Harmony, moving on with their lives.
There, I was all caught up.
The woman spoke again, so I pulled back, my gaze landing first on Gran. I knew it was ridiculous to hope that she was up and that she remembered me. That was solidified when I was met with Gran’s peaceful sleeping face.
It was better for me to accept that Gran was gone than to keep hoping she was going to wake up one day and everything would be back to normal. I was going to drive myself insane if I didn’t accept this new normal.
I glanced around the room, half expecting to see a nurse standing near the bed. But my entire body went numb when I found myself face-to-face with my mother.
Her hair was grey and cut short. Her skin was wrinkled and weathered, but her bright blue eyes held my gaze as she stared back at me. It wasn’t until I saw someone shifting their weight behind her that I realized we weren’t alone.
The man I’d seen her come into the diner with last night was standing behind her, looking a tad uncomfortable.
“What are you doing here?” I blurted out, the last bits of sleep finally clearing my mind as I sat up straighter in my chair.
Mom’s eyebrows went up, and I could see her hesitation as she studied me and then turned her attention to Gran. “Seeing my mother,” she said, with a sharpness to her tone that wasn’t lost on me.
Anger boiled up inside of me. Why was she suddenly interested in Grannow? “Where have you been the last twenty-five years?” I was shaking now.
I’d spent my life wondering what this moment would feel like. I’d wondered how I would react once I came face-to-face with my mother after all of these years.
Sure, I’d imagined some incredible family reunion where she would tell me that she’d had amnesia and had just regained her memories, which was why she’d stayed away for so long. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that my mom knew who I was, knewwhereI was, and chose to stay away. The truth was, I was so far down on her priority list that she didn’t feel the need to reach out. The need to be my mother.
I was done with this woman. The last thing I wanted to do was allow her to consume any more of my energy. I was going to move on, and she was not going to come with me.
We were over.
Her lips were parted when I turned my attention to her. Her eyebrows were raised and her arms folded as she studied me. I waited to hear her excuse, but it never came.
“If you’re thinking you’re going to get an inheritance, trust me, Gran wrapped everything up into a trust. She has indicated where she wants her effects to go, and you are not a beneficiary.”
“I…” She shook her head. “I have a right to see my mother before she passes.”
I laughed. Loud. I glanced back at her. “You gave up that right when you walked out on our family.” I nodded toward the door. “Go. You’re not wanted here. We’ve been getting along fine without you, and we’ll continue to survive long after you leave.” I turned my back to her and stared down at Gran.
I took her hand once more and squeezed it in an effort to pull some strength from her. We didn’t need Bethany. It was clear she only came around when it suitedher. Our small, broken family found a way through the pain she’d dumped on us when she left, and we were going to continue making this work.
“Cole, she’s my mother. You can’t keep me from her.”
