Page 53 of Leave Me Behind
“Of course not.” He takes a step closer to me, confidence and a gentle demeanor beaming through his eyes.
“You’re not going to be weird after?” I pry because, my God, he’s my sergeant.
His brow raises and he gives me a smug smile. “It’s been weird since the club and we’ll be parting ways soon enough,” he mutters as he reaches down and grabs his bulge through his sweatpants. My tongue slips over my bottom lip.
Eren leans over me and, as he does, I realize his scent is starkly different than Bradshaw’s. It’s musky with smokey remnants. He must see something in my eyes that even I’m not aware of because he changes his direction. “Aw, Nell. Did you catch feelings for my brother?”
Eren tilts to his side and lies on his back at the bottom of my bed. He frees his dick and starts stroking it casually, like I’m not even here. My eyes dart to his length more than once while I try to form an answer.
“No.” It doesn’t sound at all convincing. I haven’t caught feelings though. I really do hate him.
Eren watches me as he continues to pump his shaft. I decide to lie next to him and pleasure myself too. We stare into each other’s eyes as I lift the edge of my dress up and slip my hand inside my wet panties. I circle my middle finger around my clit and try to remain as stoic as Eren is, but my brows pull togetheras my orgasm starts to build. My lips part and I stare at Eren’s veiny dick, imagining it between my thighs.
“I think you do like him,” he says simply with empty eyes. The more I observe Eren, the more I believe he’s as psychotic as Bradshaw. He just hides and controls it better, which is immensely more frightening.
“What makes you think that?” I let my eyes fall back to his hand working over his length. The movement is languid and slow, teasing in a way.
“Well, for one, you’re watching me whack myself off and not taking advantage of it, so there’s a start.” His eyes dip down to my hand rubbing my clit. “And you two look at each other in this way I haven’t seen before. It’s different.”
My throat is drying at the sight at of his dick pushing out pre-come and growing as the veins protrude along his shaft.Fuck. I want it so bad. My hand isn’t even close to enough friction. It’s not the same when you’re doing it to yourself.
“And how do I look at you?” I ask. I’ve found myself admiring Eren as much as I have Bradshaw, if not more. He has more gentle and caring features. He actually smiles like a person. Like a man Ishouldbe drawn to rather than the broken, murderous version of him.
Eren presses his lips together like he needs to deeply consider my question. “You look at me like I’m something untouchable. Like I’m a shiny glass figurine out of reach that cannot be disturbed.” He gives me a shy smirk that worms its way into my chest.
“Well, you are my sergeant.”Not that that’s stopped me before.
He nods and shuts his eyes, saying with a frown, “A hard position to be in. Lonely.”
I want to tell him he doesn’t have to be, but it’d be a lie. Of course it’s lonely. It was always lonely for Jenkins. I reach slowlyover to his hand, the one that’s currently fisting a throbbing, leaking eight-inch cock.
His eyes crack open and he stares at me through heavy lashes. There’s so much pain and loneliness there. Guilt. I feel the same emptiness inside myself. I want it to go away. I want to think of anything but the gaping, agonizing hole that’s left inside my soul. It’s what we’re taught, isn’t it? To just let that shit go.
He flashes a sad smile as he accepts my invitation and scoots closer to me, pushing his cock between my thighs, slicking himself with my arousal. “I can see why you’re so popular with the bad guys,” he says, lips against my shoulder.
Bad guys? I can’t tell if he’s talking about Bradshaw, himself, or the general dark forces pond, but I reply simply, “I’m not exactly an angel, Sarge.”
“No, you certainly aren’t.” He pumps his hips and fucks my thighs, rubbing against my clit and center. His arms wrap around my back and he holds me adoringly against his chest. It makes my heart skip a beat and my breath catch.
I’m not used to gentle. It makes me uneasy, the way my chest aches for him. “I’m curious to get to the bottom of you, though. I want to see the darkest things you’re hiding. I want to know why the monsters like you so much.” His voice is raspy as his thrusts quicken.
I’m half listening as I cling to his chest and cry out as my orgasm rolls through me. He pumps a few more times before he’s shooting come on my ass and between my thighs. We lie here for a few moments, only our breaths creating sound, our hearts beating against each other.
Eren presses his head to mine and kisses my temple before untangling himself from me. He pulls his pants back up before sitting at the edge of the bed. He lets out a low sigh as he brushes his hand through his dark hair.
Who were they before becoming this? I ponder the thought again as I watch him take a few breaths. His mind seems to be warring against him, but I can’t figure out why.
“I’ll leave your dark secrets alone if you leave mine buried,” I threaten softly. I sit up and face him. Eren’s eyes are on the floor and I can’t help but take in his beauty. There’s something almost divine about him. I’m sure he can sense my eyes on him but he lets me continue to stare without bringing attention to it.
“And what is it you want me to leave buried, Bunny?” He finally looks at me with a darkness settling into his features. I study him for a moment, not sure what to say in reply to that. His voice is hard as he mutters, “I’d have to bury you if you dug up one of my secrets.”
nineteen
. . .
Nell
One of thesoldiers on the hostile squad nudges me playfully and says something I’m not paying attention to. He’s grown fond of me over these past few weeks, but I can’t even remember his fucking name.
