Page 2 of Generally Hospitable
I didn’t question her. It was a smart move. If we got hit with death magic and couldn’t get to the antidote, we’d be screwed. I popped one into my mouth and looked for a mirror. We’d beenadvised that there were secret pathways behind the mirrors. “I say we get to the tunnels and find the center of the castle from below.”
“Agreed,” she said tightly. “There!” She pointed to a large mirror down the ostentatious hallway on the right.
Staying low and alert, we made our way quickly down the hallway. Trying to pull the mirror off the wall wasn’t working.
“Crap,” I grunted as I pulled on the stupid thing. It didn’t budge. “Is it superglued to the wall?”
“Magic. It’s secured with magic,” Pandora said. “We’re going to have to break it.”
I really didn’t need seven years of bad luck for breaking an ancient mirror, but it didn’t look like we had much of a choice. I didn’t see another mirror anywhere in the vicinity.
“Fine,” I said flatly. “I am so going to burn this place down and sage the whole forsaken area when we’re done.”
Pandora laughed. “I’ll help. We just have to get it done first, Bitch.”
“From your mouth… Stinky Whore,” I said, rearing back and smashing the mirror with my fire sword.
Pandora had the same idea, and we shattered that puppy on the third try.
“In,” I ordered, shoving her toward the jagged opening. “We don’t want Chub Chub Wang to see us.”
“Trust me,” she said right before she dove headfirst through the hole. “Chub Chub Wang already knows we’re here. I’m positive the shit stain is expecting us.”
My stomach tightened to the point of pain. I was certain Pandora was right. I didn’t want her to be, but my aching gut said she was correct. Now, we just needed to figure out how to get ahead in the game. The rules… hell, there probably weren’t any rules. We were winging this shit.
The tunnel was deep within the building. If we’d been smart, which we hadn’t been, we would have peeked through the damned hole before we dove in. That would have precluded us from freefalling fifty or so feet and landing on top of each other in a tangled heap.
“Get off of me,” Pandora snarled. “Your fat ass is on my sternum.”
“First of all, my ass isn’t fat. It’s awesome,” I hissed as I crawled off my partner. “Why in the hell didn’t my mother put freaking stairs in? This is bullshit.”
I was pretty sure I’d twisted my ankle and gotten a concussion since my head had slammed into the wall multiple times on the way down. Thankfully, I could see the swelling was already going down on my ankle. Pandora had an ugly gash on her cheek, and her shoulder was definitely out of its socket.
“You want me to fix that?” I asked, doing my best not to wince. It looked painful.
“Are you a doctor?” she shouted.
“Umm… no.”
“Then that’s your answer,” she growled as she forced her arm back into place.
The sound was not good.
I stood up and looked around. As far as the eye could see, it was just hallway after hallway. “I'm not sure this was the right move,” I said.
“You think?” she snapped, gently massaging her shoulder. “And now we’re stuck because Lilith didn’t have the foresight to put in any fucking stairs.”
“Look,” I said, trying not to lose my shit. “We’re fine. We’re not dead. Neither of us lost a head on the way down. All we have to do is find the center of the castle.”
She rolled her eyes.
I rolled mine harder.
She one-upped me and bested me with an eye roll that turned her orbs pure white, beating me hands down. I knew when I couldn’t win a game. The eye roll contest was one of those games.
“The door will be overhead, somewhere in one of these halls,” I said, thinking out loud. “We need to aim our search higher on the walls.”
“And how are we supposed to reach a door that’s over our heads, dumbass?” Pandora inquired. “No stairs. Remember?”
