Page 28 of Generally Hospitable
“On it.”Irma let me know.“Moving now.”
The rumbling in my stomach and my gag reflex were getting worse. I considered a nose plug, but the stench had crept up and embedded in my freaking nostrils. There was no escaping it now.
I turned back to the battle. Abaddon was a Demon on fire. Literally. He was so pissed off, he was covered in flames and going after the enemy like a rabid animal. I watched as Chub Chub’s people did their best to avoid the love of my life. Abaddon would not be avoided. My man defined the word badass.
“Ask me,” an unfamiliar voice whispered in my ear. It was soft yet masculine and sounded kind.
I whipped around to see who was behind me. No one was behind me.
“Ask me,” the voice repeated.
I was for sure losing it, but when in Rome… “Umm… whose there? Who is talking to me?”
“Ask me what you want. I will grant it.”
“Define grant,” I said, still looking around to see who was speaking to me.
“Like I’ve already done, Bitch Goddess Cecily,” the voice said warmly. “You asked and you received.”
The realization hit me like a ton of bricks. My castle. My castle was talking to me… At least, I thought it was. “Umm… doyou have a name?” I questioned as I watched the battle unfold in front of me. We were on top, but the enemy was insanely strong. I wasn’t sure how much longer we could go without losing people. If I opened up the floor in the foyer there was a very good chance that I’d suck some of my own people into the abyss of the Netherworld. That wasn’t a fine plan.
“I have no name,” the voice said. “I permit you to choose one for me.”
“Okay,” I said, going with it. I mean, why not? I had nothing to lose and possibly something to gain. I wasn’t sure what, but that didn’t matter.
“Do you like Jim?”
“No.”
I tried again. “Steve?”
“No.”
Clearly, the castle had something in mind. I just had to figure it out… or maybe not. “How about this?” I posed. “I would like to command you to choose your name.”
The voice chuckled. He seemed like a sweet soul. Now, there was no way in hell I was going to torch the place. It could talk for the love of everything bizarre.
“I quite like the name Earl,” he told me.
“Earl it is,” I replied. “And, Earl, I have a favor to ask.”
“Ask.”
“Would it be possible for you to de-stink the flaming assholes? They’re gaining ground on my people and I need to fight. The stench is messing with me since I’m pregnant.”
“Congratulations!” Earl said.
“Thank you. Can you do something about the rank smell, Earl?”
“As you wish,” he replied.
A flash of lightning exploded overhead. The battle didn’t slow down for even a heartbeat. I covered my face so I wouldn’tget impaled by the chandelier that dropped from the ceiling and crashed to the floor about two feet away.
“Done, Bitch Goddess Cecily. I will be ready and waiting for your next command. Earl, out.”
“That was crazy,” I muttered as I cautiously sniffed the air. Earl was a freaking rockstar. It smelled like fresh laundry right off the line on a sunny summer day. My castle was a genius. The party was in motion, and I’d been a wallflower. That shit was ending now.
My people were bleeding and appendages were all over the place—theirs and ours. It was time to join in on the fun. Not fun for the bad guys, but a ton of fun for me.
