Page 77 of Shadow & Stars
“I can try.” Roman hopped from foot to foot, the air thick with tension. “Give me a second.”
Margarite watched him, her stare hard and cold, hints of her future self already gestating beneath the surface.
I swallowed a surge of anger. She made me nervous being so close to Roman. Even though we were in relatively safer times, it didn’t mean the younger version of him was safe. With the laws of nature and magic completely broken, who knew what would happen next.
The thunder hadn’t sounded again.
As Darcy talked Roman through the spell, even suggesting a form of meditation to help him empty his mind, I did my own focusing.
“Your talking doesn’t help!” Roman snapped at his future best friend.
“Sorry. Just empty your mind.”
“Will you zip it?”
His grandmother admonished him for his rudeness.
“He’s stroppy in the future,” Darcy said.
“Nice to see nothing changes,” June replied.
“Sorry,” Roman said meekly, “but I do need a bit of quiet.”
“You’re right,” Darcy agreed. “I’m sorry too. Now, focus.”
I couldn’t help but smile at their back and forth. Even in an upside-down reality, their bond remained in some form.
Rolling my shoulders, I reached out to the future.
Please let me in,I begged across the darkness.You don’t have to die. We can make this right.
To my surprise, Past Me let me in.
“Is that what you really want?” Ismael said as my vision fell into focus.
“No!” Roman bellowed. “Dig deep! Don’t you fucking dare let him win.”
Ismael’s gaze bore into mine, black tears still streaming down his face. “I lost you a long time ago.”
I tried to speak, but this Xavier’s mouth stayed firmly shut. He may have let me in, but he offered no further graces.
This is the end of us…he said.
No. It can’t end like this.
This love for the human is poison…
“Xavier…” Roman tried. “Please. I?—”
Ismael moved with terrifying speed, snatching the gun from a bodyguard’s hands.
“Goodbye, my love.”
He pulled the trigger.
23
ROMAN
