Page 79 of Shadow & Stars
The king and I stopped close to the doorway, heavy silence from those behind us.
“What do you believe lies beyond?” Ismael asked me.
“No idea. Why don’t you stick your head inside?”
He smiled. “My beheading would please you greatly.”
Hell to the yes!
I shrugged, fighting the heavy sorrow crushing my shoulders.
He’s dead. He’s your dead love. The guy you never got to tell. The future never meant to be yours.
Man, the malignant grief really didn’t let up. It wanted me to crumble like a damn biscuit.
To my surprise, Ismael stepped through the doorway. Tanith called his name, running forward.
“No!”
Butterfly joined her, the jar of time back in his possession. Damn it!
I held his gaze for a moment, then followed the king inside. Without any answers to hand, and the persistent hopelessness ready to drag me down, I let my curiosity take over. Reckless? Maybe. But Xavier exploding like that happened for a reason in a reality rapidly losing its equilibrium.
My God, my head was proper spinning.
I passed through blazing gold light, the temperature shifting from chilly to balmy. My eyes took a moment to adjust, and then every puzzle piece fell into place.
My breath caught in my throat, my knees buckling. I went down with gravity onto the grass of Grandma’s front garden.
Grandma. She was here with the teenage me. As radiant as I remembered her. The smells of her baking wafting from the open door of the house, the stunning flowers and expertly cut lawn—her garden that was her pride and joy.
There was her bench for summer days where she would do her crosswords. I joined her a lot of the time, the two of us sharing a cold glass of lemonade. At Christmas time, the garden transformed into a winter wonderland. Extra festive ornaments, lights, all that good stuff I missed so damn much.
I envied Teenage Me, wanting to be him again. To join with him, shut out this adult part of me and go back to being sixteen, if only for a little while.
“Grandma…” My vision blurred with tears. “Oh my God…”
“Roman?” Her voice. Her sweet, loving voice. I couldn’t take it, the thing in my chest set to break.
“Is that really you?” she asked.
I sniffled, succumbing to my emotions. Sobbing my guts up on the grass. I heard my name spoken again, this time by Xavier and Darcy.
Wait. Wait. Wait. My brain took a few beats to catch up. I put up a dam against my waterworks.
My lover and my bestie were here, along with… Holy shit! No. That couldn’t be right.
“Queen Margarite?” I got to my feet.
Before anyone could say anything else, I remembered the demon king and Butterfly beside me.
Everything started to click into place now. This was where I’d connected to Teenage Me. This was where I’d sent Xavier andDarcy. But the version of Xavier currently gaping at Ismael was a different one again.
Something wasn’t right, everything even more tangled than before.
“What happened here?” Ismael said, taking a step back.
The door remained behind us.
