Page 77 of The Caretaker
The stablehand appeared up ahead, and Solace waved him over. “I guess we’re about to find out.”
“Solace,” I started. “I don’t think I—”
“Sure you can,” he said. “You can do anything.”
I’d been ready to change my mind, but one trusting look from him and I’d gained the courage I needed to try. “Will you ride with me?”
“Did you think I was going to let you have all the fun?”
I took Delores for a test ride inside the paddock alone. No way would I have risked Solace’s life without first being sure I could at least manage the basics. For the most part, how to ride came back to me. With the assistance of the stablehand, Delores and I worked up to a nice trot in no time, then a canter once Solace was in the saddle with me.
Solace hugged me from behind, burying his nose into my back as we rode. “What’s the matter?” he asked when I stiffened. “Noon?”
I slowed Delores to a walk.
“What are you remembering?”
“Wind in my hair,” I whispered. “Feeling free, and… And a stream not too far beyond that path.” I pointed in the direction. “I used to ride Delores down there. I remember that. Solace…I-I remember that.”
“Take me there,” he whispered, gripping me tighter.
Solace had never shown resentment for the clarity I’d been gaining about my adolescent years. Then again, those memories weren’t the ones completely eradicated from my mind. This was the first time I’d remembered something from the two years I’d fully lost, and the memory wasn’t of him. Wasn’t of us. I could only be grateful that it wasn’t of Stacey either.
I expected him to be sad, maybe even a little jealous. I might have felt those things if our roles had been reversed. Instead, he hugged me tighter, hugged me so close I could feel his heart leaping against my back. And when his lips lingered on my shoulder blade, and his next words contained nothing but the benevolence I’d come to expect from him, I was reminded of the magic of love.
“Your wins are my wins, Care Bear, and this is a win. To feel any differently wouldn’t be loving you. Now, come on,” he said, urging me on. “I want to see what’s made you so happy right now.”
“That would be you,” I said, craning my head to look at him. “You make me happy, Solace. It’salwaysyou.” Those glistening blue eyes cut straight to my heart, straight to the part of me that would forever belong to him.
The stablehand opened the gate for us, then mounted one of the other horses to follow behind. He remained a healthy distance away, giving us privacy, but I appreciated knowing he was there. Knowing we had a guide if we ended up lost on Cole and Jasper’s estate.
“Tell me a story,” I said as we moved along the trail, the warmth of the sun making the cool breeze bearable.
“Let’s see…” He feigned thoughtfulness. “Are you in the mood for something you’ve heard before or something new?”
“Tell me about the time I lost my virginity.”
“Ohhh,” he said, extending the syllable. “I see someone’s in the mood for a good laugh.”
A burst of laughter escaped me right then, so loud and mighty that the birds within the trees we passed cleared their branches. “Don’t forget that I remember all the details to that story now, so you won’t get away with making me believe it ended with my tears of embarrassment.”
“The downside to you remembering,” he said wryly. Solace began the ancient story, and I listened and laughed, even stepping in a few times to keep him honest—to which he complained about me ruining all the fun.
We found the stream, and the stablehand made himself scarce as Solace and I forged new memories there—more than once, and in more ways than one.
Did it matter to him if I ever remembered the forgotten time we shared? Did it matter to me? Yes. It did, and it always would, if we were being honest. But we’d decided not to wait for my memories to return before starting our lives together. We’d decided it without ever speaking the words. Because one thing I knew for certain, one of the many things Solace had taught me, was that my heart remembered. My heart remembered every ounce of love we’d shared, every tear we’d cried together, every mountain of pain we’d climbed while holding each other’s hand.
My heart had fought its way back to him, not even allowing me to stand in its way. My heart had claimed him. My heart knew him. And my heart always would.
Noon
Four Years Later
FOR ONCE Icouldn’t blame the hens for waking me up. I didn’t know why I’d agreed to letting Solace set up the coop in the backyard anyway. Between the horses, the chickens, the goat, the three cats, the dog, the puppies, and the parrots we now had, the place would either soon be a working farm again or a petting zoo.
Shielding my eyes from the summer sunlight pouring through the bedroom windows, I sat up with a groan. Gone were the days when I awoke before sunrise. Nowadays, with all the animals taking over, I was lucky if I got any sleep at all. Today, waking before achieving a full eight hours wasn’t anyone’s fault but mine.
Dreaming wasn’t new to me, but this dream felt too real to be classified as such. I remembered something. Remembered a few somethings.
