Prologue
My heart pounds, faster and harder, until it feels like my chest is going to crack open and my heart fly out. Holly lies besides me, sleeping soundly, unaware of the anxiety running through me. My old friend, regret, has returned. Only this time it isn’t India that plagues my nightmares. It’s Nora. Though regret is regret, it’s different this time.
Nora isn’t dead and the murder I allowed her to witness of her ex is one breath away from being a whisper on her lips.
I vowed to never live with regret after losing India but here I am once again. Slipping out of bed, I pull on my jeans and hoodie and creep out of the room. I grab my pack of smokes and my phone, and head across to my parents’ house. I let myself in with the key under the mat and I don’t try to keep quiet. My dad is a light sleeper, and I want to wake him. While dad’s home, my mom sleeps like the dead.
In their kitchen, I grab a beer from the fridge and pull out a chair at the table. I listen to my father’s soft thuds coming down the stairs and blink when he flicks the overhead light on.
“What’s goin’ on? You look like shit.”
I crack open the beer and tip the bottle to my lips. Dad takes a seat as I sink half the beer, and finally say, “I’ve fucked up.”
“Is anyone dead?”
I shake my head. “No one we give a shit about, but it’s connected.”
I finish the rest of my beer in three long gulps and slam the empty bottle down on the table.
“You’re gonna have to talk to me, son. I can’t read your fuckin’ mind.”
“Nora.” Even saying her name is like I’m invoking her to open her mouth to the wrong person.
Dad sighs. “I wondered when this would happen.”
“You did? Why haven’t you said anything?”
He collects two beers from the fridge and passes one to me. I accept gratefully and crack it open.
“I didn’t say anything cause the gavel belongs to you now. I meant it when I said I wouldn’t involve myself in your decisions.”
“I wish you had this time, Dad. I should never have let her stay and watch Grim kill her ex. He fuckin’ sliced and diced, beat him bad before ending him as all the brothers watched on.”
“And now you don’t trust Nora to keep her mouth shut,” he remarks.
“I thought I did but lately, I’m having fuckin’ nightmares about it. It’s on my mind all fuckin’ day, every fuckin’ day. It won’t quit.”
My heart is pounding again, the beer doing nothing to ease it. I rub at my chest, but it does nothing to help.
“Usually,” Dad begins. “There’s only one way to fix this type of regret.”
My eyes widen, but not in shock at what he’s implying, but because I instantly think it’s the out I need.
“Though it’s a clusterfuck, there will be ramifications that follow. Grim, for one. She’s his old lady, the mother of his kid. And the fact he’s a brother.”
“Shit, Dad, you think I don’t know that.”
“What is your gut saying, son?”
It takes a while for the words to come but when they do, the pounding of my heart begins to ease.
“That I have to take a trip to Mercy.”
The mountain never fails to take my breath away. I wouldn’t want to live here but I can appreciate the view when I visit the Mercy chapter. Only JJ knows about this trip, Tack and the Mercy chapter have no idea I’m coming, or now here.
I kill my engine and sit for a moment before climbing off and walk over to Holly. It was a long drive for her with our few month old son and two kids. Rayna wouldn’t leave town unless Sebastian could come with us and because I’m a sucker for her happiness, I let her have her own way. Not to mention, if my daughter is happy, I have peace.
“Leo?”