Page 21 of Space Balls: Houston, We Have Liftoff
The three women on the stage look at me, eyebrows raised.
My mother jabs me in the ribs. I hadn’t even noticed she’d walked up next to me.
Luckily, she’s on my right. If she’d jabbed my left side, she might have put my racing heart into cardiac arrest. Because my poor heart, the heart that’s carefully monitored and trained by the best medical staff and physical trainers in the country, is racing at an abnormal level.
One thing is perfectly clear. Rose West is not good for me.
The laughter fades from Rose’s face. “Do I tell you how to float in space,Bodie?” She scoffs. “No, I don’t. So don’t start telling me how to pole dance.”
The woman has a point.
And with her youthful glow and billions of dollars, she’s also not a safe bet for what I have to offer.
Even so.
“Go out with me tonight.” Out of the corner of my eye I can see my mother’s head turn to meExorcist-style.
Rose laughs. “Sorry, no can do.” She tosses her hair off her shoulders with both hands, showering the stage with glitter. “I have to wash my hair.”
Myra chuckles, and Angie ducks her head, trying to hide her grin.
I narrow my eyes at her. “Tomorrow then?”
Mom’s mouth drops open. In my thirty-six years I’ve never taken anyone home, never talked to her about my love life, and definitely never asked anyone out in front of her. Though at this point, it’s more like begging.
“Nope.” Rose saunters off, stage left.
I follow her, blocking her exit at the foot of the stairs. “Anytime this week.”
She frowns at me then shifts left. I shift right. Her eyes narrow, and she shifts right. I shift left.
Crossing her arms over her sparkling chest, she begins tapping her platform on the stage. “Listen, buddy, don’t think because your mama is here I’m gonna take it easy on you.”
I mirror her stance. “I don’t think you knowhowto take it easy on someone.”
She purses her lips, like she’s contemplating what I said. “Huh.” She drops down a step, stopping two from the bottom. Eye-level with me. “You know, you may be right.” One more step and I can make out the individual droplets of sweat mingling with her body glitter. Her breasts are rising and falling faster than normal. It’s probably from pole dancing, but I’d like to think I have something to do with it.
That is until in one quick flash, she backhands my junk. She barely touches me, but what she does hit is dead center of pain town, and I hunch over, nearly going to my knees.
Two of the women gasp in shock, the third laugh/coughs. I’d like to think that wasn’t my mother.
Rose, taking advantage of my protective cower, pushes me against the wall and out of her way. “I have two brothers, Vance. You should know better than to try and bully me.” She sashays past.
Well-honed survival instincts keep me still until Rose shoves the double front doors open. The sunlight glints off her body like the fire trail of a shooting star. Even with my adrenaline pumping from the near emasculation, I can’t help but appreciate her exit style.
When the doors close and I finally look away, I’m met with my mother’s disapproving eyes.
She tosses her long dark braid over her shoulder and crosses her arms, just like she used to do when I misbehaved as a child. “You and I need to have another talk about the clitoris.”
Seven
#IamCaesar
Rose
“What the actual fuck?”The neon red, white, and blue Big Texas Saloon sign, which is usually lit up like a beacon to all those in search of a good time, is dark.
I grab my boob flask from my bra and take a swig.
