Page 51 of He Who Sleeps

"The Order took me in when I was thirteen. The others were all around the same age." He ate more dumplings. "Did you never go into foster care?" he asked curiously. "I wasn't ever given the option to stay in a home."

She shook her head. “The orphanage kept all of us. We never had the opportunity to go to a home. We all were just there. Though it wasn’t like the orphanages you see in movies. It was a huge old Victorian, something like twenty bedrooms, on land just outside of town. We had the Matron, and a few caregivers that came and went, but aside from the Matron we didn’t have anyone for too long.”

"Did they send you out to school?" He seemed fascinated by the idea, and maybe a little jealous.

“Eventually,” she said. “We all started school after our second grade year at a preparatory school, though I don’t know how, considering it was a prep school, you know? We were told we had benefactors, but we never met them or anything. When we went to college, we all got some sort of scholarship, though we did work our asses off for them.”

"You were lucky," he said softly, some darkness in his eyes that showed itself in the lines of his whole face. "I'm glad for you that your experience was like that."

“It wasn’t great. I mean, we didn’t have much interaction beyond each other. The Matron was a hard woman, and we learned early to stay out of her way. Holidays weren’t a thing for us, nor birthdays, or anything. We were just kinda...kept alive and allowed to learn, if that makes any sense? We didn’t have much of anything else.” She looked to him. “I take it your experience wasn’t quite puppies and rainbows.” She didn’t like the haunted look in his eyes. “You don’t have say or anything...”

"Trust me, your experience is a dream compared to what I went through," he told her. "But in many ways, I'm glad you don't know better. I'm glad the...darkness that touched me never came to your door."

She shook her head. “I’m sorry anything awful happened to you, Easton.” She swallowed. “But if you ever wanna talk, I’m here to listen. I might not have had the same experience, but I understand about trauma. Like I said, it wasn’t perfect, and I lost people along the way.” She thought of Kimberly and her taking her own life. “Fighting demons alone... Just know I’m here for you, regardless. No judgment, no blowback. I’m just here.”

"It's enough that you know it happened and that there are consequences," he said with a shrug. "I might overcome them one day. I might not. Either way, I'm prepared to try. For you. For my brothers."

“I’m here for you if you ever need me,” she offered as Yuki brought them more food and refills on their drinks. Whatever he went through, she was sure she didn’t want to know the details, but she would listen and witness for him, if it helped him. Deciding to change the subject, given the way he was looking at her, she said, “Carter told me you have a parrot?”

"Yes, an African Grey called Niobe," he said, seeming relieved at the change of subject.

She smiled. “Are you kidding? That’s so cool! Is she a good girl? I know some Greys can be mischievous. How long have you had her? Does she get along with people, or is she a one guy parrot?”

"She's a show off," he said. "Whenever the others come over, she tries to sing them arias." He grimaced. "She's a terrible singer."

She giggled. “Oh yeah? But I bet she loves you.” She sighed. “I always wanted pets. We couldn’t have them growing up and most places won’t allow them in the city.” She smiled. “Do you spend time with her at home, or at your studio? Or is it both the same place?” she asked shyly.

"It's hard to describe," he said with a frown. "They're separate buildings, but there's a caged aviary between them and Niobe can move around as she pleases. But I'll often shut her out when I'm working, because the chemicals I use are bad for birds. I can wear a respirator. She can't."

She nodded. “You’re a good bird dad,” she offered with a grin. The information he had given her reminded her of a few different buildings in Old City, which wasn’t so far from where she lived. “I hope I can meet her at some point. I love birds.”

"I'm not a good bird dad when I'm painting," he reminded her. "And believe me—she lets me know about it! I'm sure you'll get to meet her at some point. When the Elders have approved our union."

She smiled at that. “And if they don’t?” she asked seriously. “Honestly, if they don’t approve it, do I just get cut loose?” Or killed. If that was it, well, she would do it, having had some happiness in it all. But it wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted lunches like this every day, and dinners with Carter, yoga with Jack, runs with Leo... She wanted her men...the only ones that mattered to her.

"If they don't approve it, they will die," he said coldly. "You do not cross men like us and live."

She wasn’t prepared for that answer and the surprise showed on her face.

"You knew we were killers," he said quietly, after checking to see no one could overhear. "Why does that surprise you? You've accepted us. All of us. To men that have had our families ripped from us, when you're all we have left that is soft and sweet and good, we hold onto it."

She smiled at him. She hadn’t realized she meant anything close to that to any of them, but for Easton, the most aloof of her seven, to say it...she knew it carried weight. “I just...” She didn’t know what to say to that, but tried. “Hearing you’re cared for as such, when you haven’t really been cared for in your entire life is...daunting. I know the other guys all want me. And you...well, you have your own thing and I’m okay with that. But I didn’t ever expect that kind of outcome.” She looked up to him. “That is my want. To be with the people I want to be important to, the men that are important to me.” Even if they were killers and psychopaths, she wanted her seven. And it seemed they wanted her, too.

"I think it goes beyond want," he mused. "I think we all have a human need for acceptance, however damaged we are. You are the one person outside the brotherhood that has seen all the darkest and most perverted parts of us and yet, somehow, you still accept us. Even want us, for some reason. You have terrible taste in men."

She chuckled. “No, I have wonderful taste in men.” She picked up one of her dumplings and offered it to him. “All seven of you feel like mine. You have since that first few nights, even though I didn’t understand it then.”

"I'm still semi-convinced it's trauma bonding," he teased when he'd finished chewing. "You know, like in action movies where the guy and the girl go through something awful and then they get together at the end."

She arched a brow. “Me, too...and the crazy ones likeNatural Born KillersandThe Doom Generation?” She grinned. “What about horror?”

"This could still end up with everyone dead," he conceded with macabre humor.

“Maybe. As long as it doesn’t end up like a Disney animated musical. Something tells me Niobe would steal the show.”

"Toss up between her and Brutus," he replied with a smirk. "The dog is guaranteed to win hearts. Even I like him, and I'm not a dog person."

She giggled at the mention of the large dog. “I can’t wait to meet him, either. Carter showed me pictures of him the other night. He looks like the goodest boy.”

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