Page 113 of Crossbones
“You have no idea what we went through,” I snap. “There was nothing I could do!”
“You could have done something!” Aldric shouts. “You just didn’t try hard enough!”
His chest is heaving, fury flashing in his eyes as his fists clench at his sides. Unfortunately, he’s standing just out of reach.
“I loved her too,” I say, my voice breaking. “She was everything to me.”
“It’s too late for those kinds of sentiments,” Aldric says. “You always were a disappointment and now, not only are you the reason half of our family is dead, but you’ve been betraying us—helping strangers instead of your own blood, and galavanting off on treasure hunts with pirates! Do you know how this makes me look, Caspian?” He’s yelling at the end, his face red with rage.
“That’s all you’ve ever cared about,” I grind out. “You say you cared for our family but I don’t believe it for a second! You always had father’s ear, werealways his favorite, so don’t stand there and tell me how I make you look, because you’ve done this all to yourself. I may have killed the family, but you drove the final stake into the ground and marked the claim,brother,” I shove my face into the bars. “The De’Vero’s are over—your rule will be short, and I may be going to the noose but your crown will fall and I’ll sleep peacefully knowing you aren’t destroying any more lives.”
Aldric’s eyes glimmer with evil as he stares at me.
“Oh, you’re not going to the noose,” he sneers. “You think I’ll let this get out? No, you’ll come home, and you’ll be the obedient little brother to the King. You’re going to finally marry that bitch from House Falkren—”
“Fuck you!” I hiss.
“Or you can spend the rest of your life in the dungeons,” Aldric continues and his eyes flash maliciously. “But kill you?” He scoffs. “No—you get to live with the guilt of killing yet another person you love.” His jaw is tight but he smirks at me cruelly and turns to leave.
“Enjoy the show,brother,” he drawls.
“Aldric!” I shout at his back. “Aldric!”
The door shuts behind him and I unleash all the anger that’s been building pressure inside me. I slam my hand over and over again against the iron bars. I don’t feel the pain. My skin feels tight, like I need to rip it away in order for the rage to escape. I stalk the small space available to me, lost in thought—sinking further into the agony of my circumstances until the morning sun streaks through the window, cut through by the shadows of the bars.
No one has come to see me. I only know I’m being guarded because of the occasional murmur of voices coming from beyond the door at the end of the corridor. I’ve been avoiding looking out the barred window but I do now, straining to see the hanging platform. It’s still a slightly obstructed view, but it’s enough.
Aldric’s words have played on repeat over and over in my mind.
You have to live with the guilt of killing yet another person you love.
Someone I love.I’m such a fool. For all my eloquence and poems and pretty words, I never once told James the truth. It was in every touch, every kiss, every quiet moment we shared, and I just hope that’s enough for him to know. I hope it’s enough for him to know how completely enraptured I am by him. He cut me open with his sharp edges, baring my heart for his taking.
It’s his. It has been for a while.
I hope he knows I’m unwaveringly in love with him.
We’d been avoiding the truth and the questions of what came after the entirejourney back to Foxhollow. Avoiding answering the vulnerable questions—What came after the gold? What did it mean for us?
Are you mine? Am I yours?
Turns out the reality is so much worse. Not only did we not get to address the truth of our feelings, but I had to denounce it—I had to crush it before it ever was spoken, and that breaks me more than anything. He’ll have to die with the doubt of us lingering in the air, the uncertainty of what was between us.
The crowd begins to gather outside and I crane my neck, only able to catch part of the moment they lead James up to the platform. There’s a hood over his head. He’s dressed in dirty, blood-soaked rags. A guard leads him to the center of the platform. I grip the bars, my heart in my throat.
This can’t be happening—it has to be a nightmare. I’m going to wake up and we’ll be back on the ship.
The De’Vero executioner puts the rope over his head.
I inhale raggedly—only to choke as I gasp for air. I can’t breathe.
I can’t fucking breathe.
I’m going to fucking kill Aldric.
I’m panicking. Badly.
I can’t draw a full breath. My hands clench the bars, straining to see more. Aldric is speaking to the crowd but all I can hear is a ringing in my ears. I wish I could speak to James one last time. I wish I could look him in the eyes—and tell him the truth.
