Page 33 of Furious
“It’s a risk I’m gonna have to take. I tried to talk to Dad after he didn’t even show up to my graduation and he didn’t want to hear me out. He wouldn’t let me try out for his new team. He doesn’t believe in me. If I wanted to go to official races, I would need a lot of money I don’t have. Traveling from one race to another alone is too expensive without a team and some sponsors. The Super Bike League was ideal because it had a lot of races in California, but since that was shut down, I thought I would have to forget about racing until after college.”
DJ is still skeptical. “So the alternative is to race in a town where you could get arrested just for owning a motorcycle? Let’s not even talk about the fact that those races are organized by Calvin Fox. Do you really trust him not to fuck up in some way or get caught?”
He’s making a lot of good points and he isn’t even done voicing all his objections.
“Besides, you took an unnecessary risk tonight. You weren’t even officially in the race and you didn’t bet. So you did it all for nothing.”
He’s wrong. “Not for nothing. When I saw Chance and Lev race last week, I got worried. They never caught the person that hit Atlas. They had been in a fight with Cal the day before the race. I wasn’t sure if this was some kind of setup to finish the job, or something. I had to be there to make sure that Chance and Lev would be safe.”
I’m not surprised when DJ doesn’t like what I just said.
“And what would you have done if it was a set up? Would you have thrown yourself between them and their attackers?”
That was the plan, but I don’t even need to say it out loud.
“Zara!” DJ raises his voice. “That’s fucking crazy.”
It’s the only thing that makes sense to me. “You don’t understand, DJ. I was there two years ago when it happened.”
“I was there too, in the audience.” He reminds me.
“When that other bike came out of nowhere and—” my voice fades into a whisper. “It looked like that bike was trying to hit me. Atlas got hit because I dodged.”
Now he’s positively pissed off. “So, what are you saying? That what happened to Atlas was your fault?”
I don’t have to answer that question. Sometimes silence is worth more than a million words.
DJ, however, doesn’t see this whole thing the same way I do. “Even if it was your fault, Zara, and it wasn’t… can you even listen to yourself? To how fucked up this is? You went there tonight, crashing an illegal street race to do what? To become a human shield in case someone wanted to hurt your stepbrother? Why would you do something that stupid? You act as if you owed those guys.”
I was so busy arguing my point with DJ that I didn’t even realize that he pulled over in front of the mayor’s house. My home, now.
“Maybe I act as if I owe them because I do.” I admit. “If Ares hadn’t intervened the day before the race with Cal…”
He shakes his head. “That’s crazy. Any decent human being would have stepped in to help if they saw a woman being attacked by a douchebag twice her size.”
Maybe he’s right. But the point is moot. “That isn’t the only reason, DJ. I would have put myself between Chance, Lev and someone who wanted to hurt them because I care about them. I think I might be in love.”
DJ’s hazel eyes widen. “You’re in love with one of them?”
I laugh, but it isn’t a happy sound. “I wish it was that simple. I’m falling for both of them. And for Ares. I know they expect me to choose eventually, but what if I can’t? I’m in love with three guys. Two of them are my stepbrothers. If Mom knew this, I bet she would blame it on Dad and on my love for motorcycles. But yeah. I love them and I don’t trust Cal. No one knows who hitAtlas in Bridgeport. The only thing we know for sure is that they allegedly stole a motorcycle from Cal’s team’s paddock. There was a harsh rivalry between them even before they came to blows because of me. What if Cal paid someone to take me and them out back then, but it went wrong?”
DJ takes my hand into his much larger one. “Then that’s even more reason to stay the fuck away from your ex.”
“No. That’s even more reason to watch Cal like a fucking hawk. And there’s no better place to do that than from the inside. If something happened to Chance or Lev, I would never be able to forgive myself.”
He looks at me for a long moment. “You really love them, huh?” he sounds sad. “So I guess there’s no way out of the friend zone for me.”
“What? DJ, you know I love you, but?—”
He squeezes my hand before letting it go. “But you don’t love me that way. Wren has been telling me all along that helping you fix your dad’s old bike and taking you to races didn’t say I love you as clearly as I thought. I should have made my move much sooner, but I waited until it was too late.”
The look on his face breaks my heart.
“I don’t know what to say. I just hope you know that the last thing I want is to hurt you.”
He sighs. “I know that, Zara. That’s one of the million reasons why I’ve had this hopeless crush on you since the day Wren invited you to play in her tree house over ten years ago.”
“Wren knew and never told me?”
